I have a hard condition, to stand so that whatsoever service I do to her Majesty it shall be thought to be but servitium viscatum, lime-twigs and fetches to place myself; and so I shall have envy, not thanks.  This is a course to quench all good spirits, and to corrupt every man’s nature, which will, I fear, much hurt her Majesty’s service in the end.  I have been like a piece of stuff bespoken in the shop; and if her Majesty will not take me, it may be the selling by parcels will be more gainful.  For to be, as I told you, like a child following a bird, which when he is nearest flieth away and lighteth a little before, and then the child after it again, and so in infinitum, I am weary of it; as also of wearying my good friends, of whom, nevertheless, I hope in one course or other gratefully to deserve.  And so, not forgetting your business, I leave to trouble you with this idle letter; being but justa et moderata querimonia; for indeed I do confess, primus amor will not easily be cast off.  And thus again I commend me to you.”

After one more effort the chase was given up, at least for the moment; for it was soon resumed.  But just now Bacon felt that all the world was against him.  He would retire “out of the sunshine into the shade.”  One friend only encouraged him.  He did more.  He helped him when Bacon most wanted help, in his straitened and embarrassed “estate.”  Essex, when he could do nothing more, gave Bacon an estate worth at least L1800.  Bacon’s resolution is recorded in the following letter: 

“IT MAY PLEASE YOUR GOOD LORDSHIP,—­I pray God her Majesty’s weighing be not like the weight of a balance, gravia deorsum levia sursum.  But I am as far from being altered in devotion towards her, as I am from distrust that she will be altered in opinion towards me, when she knoweth me better.  For myself, I have lost some opinion, some time, and some means; this is my account; but then for opinion, it is a blast that goeth and cometh; for time, it is true it goeth and cometh not; but yet I have learned that it may be redeemed.  For means, I value that most; and the rather, because I am purposed not to follow the practice of the law (if her Majesty command me in any particular, I shall be ready to do her willing service); and my reason is only, because it drinketh too much time, which I have dedicated to better purposes.  But even for that point of estate and means, I partly lean to Thales’ opinion, That a philosopher may be rich if he will.  Thus your Lordship seeth how I comfort myself; to the increase whereof I would fain please myself to believe that to be true which my Lord Treasurer writeth; which is, that it is more than a philosopher morally can disgest.  But without any such high conceit, I esteem it like the pulling out of an aching tooth, which, I remember, when I was a child, and had little philosophy, I was glad of when it was done.  For your Lordship, I do think myself more beholding