The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682) eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 240 pages of information about The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682).

The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682) eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 240 pages of information about The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682).

Here they make the sole balance of State-business.  Here, with great prudence, discourse is held of the importantest State-affairs, and of the supreamest persons in authority; and in their own imaginations know more then both the Houses of Lords and Commons.  Although they never sate in Councel with any of their Footmen.  Nay they know to the weight of an ace, and can give a perfect demonstration of it, which of the three Governments is best, Monarchy, Anarchy, or Democracy.  Which many times takes such a deep root and impression upon them, and touches them so to the very heart, that they absolutely forget the governing of their needfull affairs which they went out about; for when they come to the place where their occasions lay; they find the person either long before gone abroad, or so imploied with his own business, that he can hardly a quarter do that he ought to do.

’Tis true some soft natured women, that are as innocent as Doves, observe not these sort of actions and tricks; but suffer themselves easily to be fopt off by their husbands; or else by a gentle salutation are appeased; but others who are cunninger in the cares of their Shops and Families, can no waies take a view of these doings with eys of pleasure.

Yet this is nothing near the worst sort, and is naught else but a kind of a scabbiness that the most accomplishedst marriages are infected with.  And verily if the husbands do thus neglect their times, and their Wives, in the meanwhile, like carefull Bees, are diligent in looking after their Shop and housekeeping; they ought, when they do come home to speak their minds somthing freely to them.

But the imaginary authority of men, many times surges to such height, that it seems to them insupportable, to hear any thing of a womans contradiction, thinking, that all what ever they do, is absolutely perfect and uncontrolable.  And can, on the contrary, when their Wives go to the Shambles or Market, reckon to a minute in what time they ought to be back again:  And wo be to them, if they do, according to the nature of women, stand and prattle here or there their time away, concerning Laces, Cookery, and other houshold occasions.

But you, O wel married Couple, how pleasant it is to see that you two agree so well together!  That either is alike diligent and earnest in taking care of their charge.  That your husband many times saith unto you his houswife, my Dear, it is a curious fair day, go walk abroad, and give a visit to some or other of your good acquaintance; I shall tarry at home the whole day, and will take sufficient care of all things, and in the evening come and fetch you home, &c.  And you again in like manner, upon a good occasion, releeve your husband, and take delight in his walking abroad with some good friends to take his pleasure, and to recreate and refresh his tired sences.

If he be a little sickish of that distemper and that he will somtimes spend a penny upon a Libel or new Tiding; that is a great pleasure for you, because you know that the Booksellers and Printers must live; and every fool must have one or t’other bawble to play with.

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The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682) from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.