The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682) eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 240 pages of information about The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682).

The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682) eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 240 pages of information about The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682).

Here you may see abundance of Country Gentlemen and rich Farmers, coming from several parts with their Cocks in their bags to the Battel; hanging them up there in ample form till it be their turns to fight.  And there also you may behold Lord Spendall brought thither in his Coach very magnificently, and carried home in no less state; but seldom goes away before he hath either won or lost a pretty number of Guinneys.

Yea there’s Squire Clearpurse, with his Princely companion, who keep alwaies six and thirty Game-Cocks at nurse by the Master of the Pit; never goes away from thence, before he hath got, by his ordinary dunghill Cock that runs about the streets, and without false spurs too, half a score Crown-pieces, and as much more as will pay his reckoning in his pocket.  But if they both begin to appear with their Shake-bags, then it is, Stand clear Gentlemen, here comes the honour of the Pit; and then the Master of the Pit must have out of each Battel for Sharpning the Spurs, and clipping of the neck feathers, half a Ginny; and then when the Battels ended, he brings into the reckoning half a Crown extra for Brandy, Salve, and cherishing and chafing it by the fire, &c.  But for this, they have the honour also to be in the Chamber with the principallest Gentlemen, to sit in the best places of the Pit; to turn the hour-glass and like prudent Aldermen, in the presence of all the Auditors, to give their judgements touching the contending parties; where there are generally more Consultations, Advices, and Sentences, held and pronounced, then are to be found or heard of in the principallest Law-books or Statutes of the Kingdom.

It would be here an everlasting shame; if the Conqueror, like a Niggard, should carry all this mony home; therefore the greatest part must be given and generously spent with the company.  This is the duty of every one, whose Cock hath beaten anothers out of the Pit, and went away Crowing like a Conqueror.  Nay, what’s matter if it were all spent, its no such great peece of business; the honours more worth then the mony.

In the mean while it grows late in the night, and the good woman, with the Table covered, sits longing, telling every minute, and hoping for the coming home of him, who seems to find and take more pleasure in Cockfighling, then like a brave Game-Cock himself to enter into the Pit with his Wife.  O most contrary and miserable Pleasure of marriage on the mens side.

But amongst these Cock-Merchants, I am of opinion, there’s none hath more pleasure then the Master of the Pit; because he gets more for the feeding, clipping, salving, and anointing of them, &c. then ten good Nurses, and put them all together.  And moreover he hath all the pleasure for nothing, and is mighty observant to feed and tickle their fancies, and obey their commands, that their delight therein may the more and more increase, and the reckoning also be ne’r a whit the less.

And these Lovers and Gentlemen are no sooner departed, but he laies him down very orderly in a very fashionable Bedstead, hung round about the Curtains and Vallians with Hens-Eg-shels suck’d out.  But if he did, for the same purpose, suck out all the Cocks-Egshels, it would be a much more rare and pleasant sight.

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The Ten Pleasures of Marriage and The Confession of the New-married Couple (1682) from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.