It would be sempiternal for us here to make a relation of all the petulancy and wickedness of Students, whereof these and other Parents, each in their particular, are miserably sensible of.  For every one acts his own part, but it tends altogether unto wickedness, lavishness, and troublesomness.

Here you may see Master Empty-belly takes the greatest delight in the World, nobly to treat some Northern Gentlemen of his acquaintance and Pot-companions, and then again to be treated by them:  where there is an absolute agreement made, that when any one of them gets mony from their Parents, he shall give the company a treat of five Guinnies.  And though they generally observe, that before they part, one quarrel or other arises, and the Swords drawn; yet this Law is inviolabler, than ever any Statutes of Henry the VIII. were.  Which continued so long till one of them be desperately wounded or killed, and he that did it apprehended; and to the great greef of his Parents tried for his life, or else flies his Country, to save it.

Others we may see, that have no greater pleasure then to sit whole nights with their Companions playing at Tables; and there game away Rings, Hats, Cloaks and Swords, &c. and then ply one another so close with whole bumpers of Sack and old Hock, that they are worse then senceless beasts, feeling and groping of the very Walls, and tumbling and wallowing to and fro in their own nastiness.  And esteem it to be a Championlike action if one can but make the t’other dead drunk by his voracity of sucking in most.  As if they intended hereby to become learned Doctors.

Some again are most horribly addicted to frequent the pestilential Bawdy-houses; of which they are never satisfied, till mony, cloaths, books, and their own health of body is consumed; and then come home to their Parents soundly peppered.

Some there are that oftentimes so deeply ingage themselves with their Landlords daughters, that they can answer to her examination without the knowledge either of their Parents or Doctors, and are fit for promotion in the Art of Nature.  But if the Landlady hath never a daughter of her own, there’s a Neece or Neighbors daughter, which knows how to shew her self there so neatly, that with her tripping and mincing she makes signals enough, that at their house Cubicula locanda is to be had.  And these are the true Divers, that know infinitely well how to empty the Students Pockets.

Thus doth every one act their parts.  Whilest the Parents are indeavouring to gather and scrape all together that they can, that their Son, who is many times the onliest or eldest, may go forward in his study, and become perfect in one Faculty.  And the more, because they see that he is sharp-witted, and according as his Doctor saith, a very hopefull young man.  Little thinking that he makes as bad use of those natural benefits, as he is lavish of his mony.

But it is a common saying that the London-youths must have their wills.  Which oftentimes occasions, that when they have studied a long time in Divinity, they finally turn to be some Inns of Court Gentlemen; fearing that their wild Students life, might in any other vocation, be cast in their teeth.