“O Ali.  The devil has indeed begotten a devil, even that spirit Petrol.  And the young devil waxeth, and increaseth in lustihood and is ten years old and becoming like to his father.  Come therefore and help us with the ineffable seal.  For there is none like Ali.”

And Ali turns where his slaves scatter rose-leaves, letting the letter fall, and deeply draws from his hookah a puff of the scented smoke, right down into his lungs, and sighs it forth and smiles, and lolling round on to his other elbow speaks comfortably and says, “And shall a man go twice to the help of a dog?”

And with these words he thinks no more of England but ponders again the inscrutable ways of God.

The Bureau d’Echange de Maux

I often think of the Bureau d’Echange de Maux and the wondrously evil old man that sate therein.  It stood in a little street that there is in Paris, its doorway made of three brown beams of wood, the top one overlapping the others like the Greek letter pi, all the rest painted green, a house far lower and narrower than its neighbours and infinitely stranger, a thing to take one’s fancy.  And over the doorway on the old brown beam in faded yellow letters this legend ran, Bureau Universel d’Echanges de Maux.

I entered at once and accosted the listless man that lolled on a stool by his counter.  I demanded the wherefore of his wonderful house, what evil wares he exchanged, with many other things that I wished to know, for curiosity led me; and indeed had it not I had gone at once from that shop, for there was so evil a look in that fattened man, in the hang of his fallen cheeks and his sinful eye, that you would have said he had had dealings with Hell and won the advantage by sheer wickedness.

Such a man was mine host; but above all the evil of him lay in his eyes, which lay so still, so apathetic, that you would have sworn that he was drugged or dead; like lizards motionless on a wall they lay, then suddenly they darted, and all his cunning flamed up and revealed itself in what one moment before seemed no more than a sleepy and ordinary wicked old man.  And this was the object and trade of that peculiar shop, the Bureau Universel d’Echange de Maux:  you paid twenty francs, which the old man proceeded to take from me, for admission to the bureau and then had the right to exchange any evil or misfortune with anyone on the premises for some evil or misfortune that he “could afford,” as the old man put it.

There were four or five men in the dingy ends of that low-ceilinged room who gesticulated and muttered softly in twos as men who make a bargain, and now and then more came in, and the eyes of the flabby owner of the house leaped up at them as they entered, seemed to know their errands at once and each one’s peculiar need, and fell back again into somnolence, receiving his twenty francs in an almost lifeless hand and biting the coin as though in pure absence of mind.