The Pleasures of a Single Life, Or, The Miseries of Matrimony eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 34 pages of information about The Pleasures of a Single Life, Or, The Miseries of Matrimony.

The Pleasures of a Single Life, Or, The Miseries of Matrimony eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 34 pages of information about The Pleasures of a Single Life, Or, The Miseries of Matrimony.

Thus the new Covenant I strictly kept,
And oft in private for her Failings wept,
Yet bore with seeming Cheerfulness those Cares,
That bring a Man too soon to grisled Hairs.

But all this kindness I dispens’d in vain. 
Where Lust and base Ingratitude remain. 
Lust, which if once in Female fancy fix’d,
Burns like Salt Petre, with driy Touchwood mix’d: 
And tho’ cold Fear for time may stop its force, }
Twill soon like Fire confin’d, break out the worse, }
Or like a Tide obstucted, re-assume its course. }

No Art cou’d e’e presume the stinking Stote,
Or change the lecherous Nature of the Goat
No skilful Whitster ever found the flight,
To wash or bleach an Ethiopian White. 
No gentle Usage truly will Asswage,
A Tyger’s fierceness, or a Lyon’s rage,
Stripes and severe Correction is the way,
Whence once they’re thro’ly Conquer’d, they’ll obey,
’Tis Whip and Spur, Commanding Reign and Bit,
That makes the unruly head-strong Horse submit,
So stubborn faithless Woman must be us’d,
Or Man by Woman basely be abus’d.

For after all the Endearments I should show,
At last she turn’d both Libertine and Shrow,
From my Submission grew perverse and proud,
Crabbed as Varges, and as Thunder loud;
Did what she pleas’d, would no Obedience own,
And redicul’d the Patience I had shown. 
Fear’d no sharp threatnings, valued no disgrace,
But flung the wrongs she’d done me in my Face;
Grew still more head strong, turbulent and Lewd,
Filling my Mansion with a spurious brood. 
Thus Brutal Lust her humane Reason drown’d,
And her loose Tail obliged the Country round;
Advice, Reproof, Pray’rs, Tears, were flung away,
For still she grew mord wicked ev’ry day;
Till By her equals scorn’d, my Servants fed,
The Brutal Rage of her adultrous bed. 
Nay, in my absence trucled to my Groom,
And hug’d the servile Traytor in my Room;
When these strange Tydings, Thunder struck my Ear,
And such Inhumane Wrongs were made appear,
On these just Grounds for a Divorce I su’d, }
At last that head-strong Tyrant wife subdu’d, }
Cancel’d the marriage-bonds, and basterdiz’d her brood. }

Woman, thou worst of all Church-plagues, farewel;
Bad at the best, but at the worst a Hell;
Thou truss of wormwood, bitter Teaz of Life,
Thou Nursery of humane cares a wife. 
Thou Apple-Eating Trayt’riss who began
The Wrath of Heav’n, and Miseries of Man,
And hast with never-failing diligence,
Improv’d the Curse to humane Race e’er since. 
Farewel Church-juggle that enslav’d my Life,
But bless that Pow’r that rid me of my Wife. 
And now the Laws once more have set me free,
If Woman can again prevail with me,
My Flesh and Bones shall make my Wedding-Feast, }
And none shall be Invited as my Guest, }
T’ attend my Bride, but th’ Devil and a Priest. }

Copyrights
Project Gutenberg
The Pleasures of a Single Life, Or, The Miseries of Matrimony from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.