“Now that I thinks of the matter, it’s Doc Peets who restores Dave Tutt to full standin’ with Tucson Jennie, the time she begins to neglect Dave.  You see, the trouble is this a-way:  It really starts—­leastwise I allers so believes—­in Dave’s beginnin’ wrong with Tucson Jennie.  Troo, as I confesses to you frequent yeretofore, I ain’t married none myse’f; still, I’ve been livin’ a likely number of years, an’ has nacherally witnessed a whole lot touchin’ other gents an’ their wives; an’ sech experiences is bound to breed concloosions.  An’ while I may be wrong, for these yere views is nothin’ more than a passel of ontested theeries with me, it’s my beliefs that thar’s two attitoodes, speakin’ gen’ral, which a gent assoomes toward his bride.  Either he deals with her on what we-all will call the buck-squaw system, or he turns the game about complete, an’ organises his play on the gentleman-lady system.  In the latter, the gent waits on his wife; he comes an’ he goes, steps high or soft, exactly as she commands.  She gives the orders; an’ he rides a pony to death execootin’ ’em, an’ no reemonstrances nor queries.  That wife is range an’ round-up boss for her outfit.

“But the buck-squaw system is after all more hooman an’ satisfactory.  It’s opposite to the other.  The gent is reesponsible for beef on the hook an’ flour in the bar’l.  He’s got to provide the blankets, make good ag’in the household’s hunger, an’ see to it thar’s allers wood an’ water within easy throw of every camp he pitches.  Beyond that, however, the gent who’s playin’ the buck-squaw system don’t wander.  When he’s in camp, he distinguishes himse’f by doin’ nothin’.  He wrops himse’f in his blankets, camps down by the fire, while his wife rustles his chuck an’ fills his pipe for him.  At first glance, this yere buck-squaw system might strike a neeophyte as a mighty brootal scheme.  Jest the same, it’ll eemerge winner twenty times to the gentleman-lady system’s once.  The women folks like it.  Which they’ll pretend they prefers the gentleman-lady system, where they sets still an’ the gent attends on ’em; but don’t you credit it, none whatever.  It’s the good old patriarchal, buck-squaw idee, where the gent does nothin’ an’ the lady goes prancin’ about like the ministerin’ angel which she is, that tickles her to death.  I states ag’in, that it’s my notion, Dave who begins with Tucson Jennie—­they bein’ man an’ wife—­on the gentleman-lady system, tharby hatches cold neglect for himse’f.  An’ if it ain’t for the smooth savey of Doc Peets, thar’s no sport who could foretell the disastrous end.  Dave, himse’f thinks he’d have had eventool to resign his p’sition as Jennie’s husband an’ quit.

“Which I’ve onfolded to you prior of Jennie’s gettin’ jealous of Dave touchin’ that English towerist female; but this yere last trouble ain’t no likeness nor kin to that.  Them gusts of jealousy don’t do no harm nohow; nor last the day.  They’re like thunder showers; brief an’ black enough, but soon over an’ leavin’ the world brighter.