Or glittering tinsel of May Fair,
Could with this rod of Sid compare.[8]
  Dear Sid, then why wert thou so mad
To break thy rod like naughty lad?[9]
You should have kiss’d it in your distress,
And then return’d it to your mistress;
Or made it a Newmarket switch,[10]
And not a rod for thine own breech. 
But since old Sid has broken this,
His next may be a rod in piss.

[Footnote 1:  Cid Hamet Ben Eng’li, the supposed inspirer of Cervantes.  See “Don Quixote,” last chapter.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 2:  When Swift came to London, in 1710, about the time the ministry was changed, his reception from Lord Treasurer Godolphin was, as he wrote to Archbishop King, 9th Sept., “altogether different from what he ever received from any great man in his life, altogether short, dry, and morose.”  To Stella he writes that this coldness had “enraged him so that he was almost vowing revenge.”  On the Treasurer’s enforced retirement, Swift’s resentment took effect in the above “lampoon” which was read at Harley’s, on the 15th October, 1710, and “ran prodigiously,” but was not then “suspected for Swift’s.”  See Journal to Stella, Sept. 9 and Oct. 15.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 3:  The virgula divina, said to be attracted by minerals.—­Swift.]

[Footnote 4:  Supposed to allude to the Union.—­Swift.]

[Footnote 5:  Mercury’s Caduceus, by which he could settle all disputes and differences.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 6:  Godolphin’s favour arose from his connexion with the family of Marlborough by the marriage of his son to the Duke’s daughter, Henrietta Churchill.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 7:  An eminent toyman in Fleet Street.—­Scott.]

[Footnote 8:  The allusion is to Godolphin’s name, Sidney, and to his staff of office.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 9:  A letter was sent him by the groom of the Queen’s stables to desire he would break his staff, which would be the easiest way both to her Majesty and him.  Mr. Smith, Chancellor of the Exchequer, happening to come in a little after, my lord broke his staff, and flung the pieces in the chimney, desiring Mr. Smith to witness that he had obeyed the Queen’s commands.  Swift to Archbishop King, Sept. 9, 1710.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 10:  Lord Godolphin is satirized by Pope for a strong attachment
to the turf.  See his “Moral Essays,” Epist.  I, 81-5. 
  “Who would not praise Patritio’s high desert,
  His hand unstain’d, his uncorrupted heart,”
  “He thanks you not, his pride is in piquet,
  Newmarket fame, and judgment at a bet.”]

THE FAMOUS SPEECH-MAKER OF ENGLAND

OR BARON (ALIAS BARREN) LOVEL’S CHARGE
AT THE ASSIZES AT EXON, APRIL 5, 17IO

Risum teneatis?—­HORAT., Ars Poetica, 5.

From London to Exon,
By special direction,
Came down the world’s wonder,
Sir Salathiel Blunder,
With a quoif on his head
As heavy as lead;
And thus opened and said: