One gives advice in proverbs old,
Instructs us how to tame a scold;
One shows how bravely Audouin died,
And at the gallows all denied;
How by the almanack ’tis clear,
That herrings will be cheap this year.
  T.  Dear Mullinix, I now lament
My precious time so long mispent,
By nature meant for nobler ends: 
O, introduce me to your friends! 
For whom by birth I was design’d,
Till politics debased my mind;
I give myself entire to you;
G—–­d d—­n the Whigs and Tories too!

[Footnote 1:  This is a severe satire upon Richard Tighe, Esq., whom the Dean regarded as the officious informer against Sheridan, in the matter of the choice of a text for the accession of George I, Swift had faithfully promised to revenge the cause of his friend, and has certainly fully redeemed his pledge, in this and the following pasquinades.  Mad Mullinix, or Molyneux, was a sort of crazy beggar, a Tory politician in His madness, who haunted the streets of Dublin about this time.  In a paper subscribed Dr. Anthony, apparently a mountebank of somewhat the same description, the doctor is made to vindicate his loyalty and regard for the present constitution in church and state, by declaring that he always acted contrary to the politics of Captain John Molyneux.  The immediate occasion for publication is assigned in the Intelligencer, in which paper the dialogue first appeared.—­Scott.

“Having lately had an account, that a certain person of some distinction swore in a public coffee-house, that party should never die while he lived, (although it has been the endeavour of the best and wisest among us, to abolish the ridiculous appellations of Whig and Tory, and entirely to turn our thoughts to the good of our prince and constitution in church and state,) I hope those who are well-wishers to our country, will think my labour not ill-bestowed, in giving this gentleman’s principles the proper embellishments which they deserve; and since Mad Mullinix is the only Tory now remaining, who dares own himself to be so, I hope I may not be censured by those of his party, for making him hold a dialogue with one of less consequence on the other side.  I shall not venture so far as to give the Christian nick-name of the person chiefly concerned, lest I should give offence, for which reason I shall call him Timothy, and leave the rest to the conjecture of the world.”—­Intelligencer, No. viii.  See an account of this paper in “Prose Works,” ix, 311.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 2:  “Sir Martin Marall,” one of Dryden’s most successful comedies.  See Malone’s “Life of Dryden,” p. 93.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 3:  “Ilias,” lib. ii, 211, seq.—­W.  E. B.]

[Footnote 4:  To reach at vomiting.]

[Footnote 5:  King William III.]

[Footnote 6:  Old word for a puppet-show.—­Scott.]

TIM AND THE FABLES