practice of ladies who in society neglect the satisfaction of their natural needs from misplaced motives of modesty.  On a railway journey I suffer horribly from the thought that one of my fellow-travelers may be prevented from fulfilling some imperative natural necessity.

“I naturally devote the greatest attention to my own digestion.  With painful conscientiousness I go to stool every day at the same hour; if the operation does not come off to my satisfaction I feel not so much physical as mental discomfort.  To this quite useful hygienic interest became associated at puberty a sensual interest.  Since my fourteenth year I have had no greater enjoyment than to defecate undressed (I do not do so now) after having first carefully examined the distension of my abdomen.  In summer I would go into the woods, undress myself in a secluded spot and indulge in the voluptuous pleasures of defecation.  I would sometimes combine with this a bath in a stream.  I would exhaust my imagination in the effort to invent specially enjoyable variations, longed for a desert island where I could go about naked, fill my body with much nourishing food, hold in the excrement as long as possible and then discharge it in some subtly-thought-out spot.  These practices and ideas often caused erections and later on emissions, but the genitals played no part in my conceptions; their movements were uncomfortable and gave no pleasure.

“I soon longed to be associated in these orgies with some boy of the same age, but I wanted not only a companion in my passion, but also a real friend.  Since there could be no question of masturbation or paederasty, our love would have been limited to kisses, embraces, and—­as a compensation for coitus—­defecation together.  That would have been perfect bliss to me.  I will spare you the unaesthetic contents of my voluptuous dreams.  But I remained without a companion, and, therefore, without real enjoyment. [He has, however, on various occasions experienced erections, and even emissions, on seeing, by chance, men or boys defecate.] Hinc illae lacrimae; the excitement over my own defecation only took place faute de mieux.

“I knew very well that my thoughts and practices were impure and contemptible.  Ah! how often, when the intoxication was over, have I thrown myself remorsefully on my knees, praying to God for pardon!  For some weeks I repressed my longing; but at last it was too strong for me, I tried to justify myself and fell into my vice anew.  That I was guilty of licentiousness and loved boys sexually first became clear to me later on, when I knew the significance of erection as a sign of sexual excitement.

“No one can imagine with what demoniacal joy I am possessed at the thought of a beautiful naked boy whose abdomen is filled as the result of long abstinence from stool.  The thought powerfully excites me, a flood of passion goes