23.  This angling for praise is so prevailing a principle, that it frequently stoops to the lowest object.  Men will often boast of doing that, which, if true, would be rather a disgrace to them than otherwise.  One man affirms that he rode twenty miles within the hour:  ’tis probably a lie; but suppose he did, what then?  He had a good horse under him, and is a good jockey.  Another swears he has often at a sitting, drank five or six bottles to his own share.  Out of respect to him, I will believe him a liar; for I would not wish to think him a beast.

24.  These and many more are the follies of idle people, which, while they think they procure them esteem, in reality make them despised.

To avoid this contempt, therefore, never speak of yourself at all, unless necessity obliges you; and even then, take care to do it in such a manner, that it may not be construed into fishing for applause.  Whatever perfections you may have, be assured, people will find them out; but whether they do or not, nobody will take them upon your own word.  The less you say of yourself, the more the world will give you credit for; and the more you say, the less they will believe you.

Affectation.

1.  A late conversation which I fell into, gave me an opportunity of observing a great deal of beauty in a very handsome woman, and as much wit in an ingenious man, turned into deformity in the one, and absurdity in the other, by the mere force of affectation.  The fair one had something in her person upon which her thoughts were fixed, that she attempted to shew to advantage in every look, word and gesture.

2.  The gentleman was as diligent to do justice to his fine parts, as the lady to her beauteous form:  you might see his imagination on the stretch to find out something uncommon, and what they call bright, to entertain her:  while she writhed herself into as many different postures to engage him.  When she laughed, her lips were to sever at a greater distance than ordinary to shew her teeth.

3.  Her fan was to point to somewhat at a distance, that in the reach she may discover the roundness of her arm; then she is utterly mistaken in what she saw, falls back, smiles at her own folly, and is so wholly discomposed, that her tucker is to be adjusted, her bosom exposed, and the whole woman put into new airs and graces.

4.  While she was doing all this, the gallant had time to think of something very pleasant to say next to her, or make some unkind observation on some other lady to feed her vanity.  These unhappy effects of affectation naturally led me to look into that strange state of mind, which so generally discolours the behaviour of most people we meet with.

5.  The learned Dr. Burnet, in his Theory of the Earth, takes occasion to observe, that every thought is attended with consciousness and representativeness; the mind has nothing presented to it, but what is immediately followed by a reflection of conscience, which tells you whether that which was so presented is graceful or unbecoming.