After much heated discussion, it was unanimously resolved to protest at once against the substitution of such a fraud as this poultry for our legitimate rations of “salt horse.” so, bearing the DISJECTA MEMBRA of our meal, the whole crowd marched aft, and requested an interview with the skipper.  He came out of the cabin at once, saying, “Well, boys, what’s the matter?” The spokesman, a bald-headed Yankee, who had been bo’sun’s mate of an American man-of-war, stepped forward and said, offering his kid, “Jest have a look at that sir.”  The skipper looked, saying, inquiringly, “Well?” “D’yew think, sir,” said Nat, “THET’S proper grub for men?” “Proper grub!  Why, you old sinner, you don’t mean to say you’re goin’ to growl about havin’ chicken for dinner?” “Well, sir, it depends muchly upon the chicken.  All I know is, that I’ve et some dam queer tack in my time, but sence I ben fishin’ I never had no such bundles of sticks parcelled with leather served out to me.  I hev et boot—­leastways gnawed it; when I was cast away in a open boat for three weeks—­but it wa’n’t bad boot, as boots go.  Now, if yew say that these things is boots, en thet it’s necessary we should eat’em, or starve, w’y, we’ll think about it.  But if yew call’em chickens,’n say you’re doin’ us a kindness by stoppin’ our’lowance of meat wile we’re wrastlin’ with ’em, then we say we don’t feel obliged to yew, ’n ’ll thank yew kindly to keep such lugsuries for yerself, ’n give us wot we signed for.”  A murmur of assent confirmed this burst of eloquence, which we all considered a very fine effort indeed.  A moment’s silence ensued; then the skipper burst out, “I’ve often heard of such things, but hang me if I ever believed ’em till now!  You ungrateful beggars!  I’ll see you get your whack, and no more, from this out.  When you get any little extras aboard this ship agen, you’ll be thankful for ’em; now I tell you.”  “All right, sir,” said Nat; “so long as we don’t hev to chaw any more of yer biled Bimly crows, I dessay we shall worry along as usual.”  And, as the Parliamentary reports say, the proceedings then terminated.

Now, suppose the skipper had told the story to some of his shore friends, how very funny the sailors’ conduct would have been made to appear.

On another occasion long after, when I was mate of a barque loading mahogany in Tonala, Mexico, the skipper thought he would practise economy by buying a turtle instead of beef.  A large turtle was obtained for twenty-five cents, and handed over to the cook to be dealt with, particular instructions being given him as to the apportionment of the meat.