She turned back, swallowing her tears with difficulty and gave him a quivering smile. “Oh, I know. You are so good. And it was dear of you to—to let me take your place with her. None but you would have done such a thing.”
“My dear, it was far better for her, and she wished it,” he interposed. “Besides, with Eustace away, I had plenty to do. You mustn’t twist that into a virtue. It was the only course open to me. I knew that it would lift her out of misery to have you, and—naturally—I wished it too.”
She nodded. “It was just like you. And I—I ought to have remembered that it couldn’t last. It has been such a comfort to—to have my darling to love and care for. But oh, the blank when she is gone!”
Scott was silent.
“It’s wrong to want to keep her, I know,” Dinah went on wistfully. “She has got so wonderfully happy of late; and I know it is the thought of nearing the end of the journey that makes her so. And when I am with her, I feel happy too for her sake. But when I am away from her—it—it’s all so dreary. I—feel so frightened and—alone.”
“Don’t be frightened!” Scott said gently. “You never are alone.”
“Ah, but life is so difficult,” she whispered.
“It would be,” he answered, “if we had to face it all at once. But, thank God, that is not so. We can only see a little way ahead. We can only do a little at a time.”
“Do you think that is a help?” she said. “I would give anything—sometimes—to look into the future.”
“I think the burden would be greater than we could bear,” Scott said.
“Oh, do you? I think it would be such a relief to know.” Dinah uttered a sharp sigh. “It’s no good talking,” she said. “Only one thing is certain. I’m not going to break with Billy of course, but I’ll never go back to Perrythorpe again, never as long as I live!”
There was a quiver of passion in her voice. She looked at Scott with what was almost a challenge in her eyes.
He did not answer it. His face wore a look of perplexity. But, “If I were in your place,” he said quietly, “I think I should say the same.”
“I am sure you would,” she said warmly. “I only tolerated it so long because I didn’t know what freedom was like. When I went to Switzerland, I found out; and when I came back, it just wasn’t endurable any longer. But I wish I knew—I do wish I knew—what I were going to do.”
The words were out before she could stop them, but the moment they were uttered she made a sharp gesture as though she would recall them.
“I’m silly to talk like this,” she said. “Please forget it!”
He smiled a little. “Not silly, Dinah,” he said, “but mistaken. Believe me, the future is already provided for.”
Her brows contracted slightly. “Ah, you are good,” she said. “You believe in God.”
“So do you,” he said, with quiet conviction.