present I fail.” At one time he thought
of finding comfort in unusual honors to the dead.
He would build a shrine of which Tullia should be
the deity. “I am determined,” he writes,
“on building the shrine. From this purpose
I cannot be turned ... Unless the building be
finished this summer, I shall hold myself guilty.”
He fixes upon a design. He begs Atticus, in one
of his letters, to buy some columns of marble of Chios
for the building. He discusses the question of
the site. Some gardens near Rome strike him as
a convenient place. It must be conveniently near
if it is to attract worshipers. “I would
sooner sell or mortgage, or live on little, than be
disappointed.” Then he thought that he would
build it on the grounds of his villa. In the end
he did not build it at all. Perhaps the best
memorial of Tullia is the beautiful letter in which
one of Cicero’s friends seeks to console him
for his loss. “She had lived,” he
says, “as long as life was worth living, as long
as the republic stood.” One passage, though
it has often been quoted before, I must give.
“I wish to tell you of something which brought
me no small consolation, hoping that it may also somewhat
diminish your sorrow. On my way back from Asia,
as I was sailing from Aeigina to Megara, I began to
contemplate the places that lay around me. Behind
me was Aegina, before me Megara; on my right hand
the Piraeus, on my left hand Corinth; towns all of
them that were once at the very height of prosperity,
but now lie ruined and desolate before our eyes.
I began thus to reflect: ’Strange! do we,
poor creatures of a day, bear it ill if one of us
perish of disease, or are slain with the sword, we
whose life is bound to be short, while the dead bodies
of so many lie here inclosed within so small a compass?”
But I am anticipating. When Cicero was in exile
the republic had yet some years to live; and there
were hopes that it might survive altogether.
The exile’s prospects, too, began to brighten.
Caesar had reached for the present the height of his
ambition, and was busy with his province of Gaul.
Pompey had quarreled with Clodius, whom he found to
be utterly unmanageable. And Cicero’s friend,
one Milo, of whom I shall have to say more hereafter,
being the most active of them all, never ceased to
agitate for his recall. It would be tedious to
recall all the vicissitudes of the struggle.
As early as May the Senate passed a resolution repealing
the decree of banishment, the news of it having caused
an outburst of joy in the city. Accius’
drama of “Telamon” was being acted at
the time, and the audience applauded each senator as
he entered the Senate, and rose from their places
to greet the consul as he came in. But the enthusiasm
rose to its height when the actor who was playing
the part of Telamon (whose banishment from his country
formed part of the action of the drama) declaimed
with significant emphasis the following lines—