Plain folk, who sold drugs when I was a boy, were not ashamed to be called druggists, but now they are pharmaceutical chymists, and analytical Homoeopathists; and one is tempted to quote Canning’s paraphrase, which he made when Dr. Addington had been complimenting the country party, “I do remember an apothecary, gulling of simples.”  Persons who cut hair were known as hair-cutters, and they who attended to the feet were called corn-cutters; but now the former are artists in hair, and the latter are chiropodists.

No long time ago I consulted with an intelligent tradesman as to the best way of protecting from frost a long line of standard rose-trees, growing near a wall in my garden, and shortly afterwards I received from him the drawing of a clever design, with a letter informing me that he had now the pleasure of submitting to my inspection his idea of a Cheimoboethus.  When I rallied from my swoon, and was staggering towards my lexicon, I remembered that, as [Greek:  cheimon] was the Greek for winter, and [Greek:  boaethos] for a friend in need, the word was not without appropriate meaning; but I never took heart to order the invention, because I felt convinced that, if I were to inform my gardener that we were going to have a Cheimoboethus, he would say that he would rather leave.

A bird-stuffer is now a plumassier and taxidermist; and when I asked a waiter the meaning of “Phusitechnicon,” which I read over a shop opposite his hotel, he told me it meant old china.  And he bowed respectfully, as one who knew how to treat a great scholar, when he met him, as I remarked gravely, “Ah yes, I see:  no doubt from phusi—­the ancients, and technicon—­cups and saucers.”

Nor can I leave these long Greek words without noticing another objectionable abuse of them, whereby, upon the principle that “what in the captain’s but a choleric word, is in the soldier flat blasphemy,” a distinction is made between vice in the rich and vice in the poor, and that which in the latter is obstinate depravity, to be handled only by the police, becomes in the former a pitiable weakness or an irresistible impulse to be gently nursed by the physician.  If a poor man steals, he is a desperate thief; but if a rich man fancies that which does not belong to him he is a Kleptomaniac, and “the spoons will be returned.”  If a poor man is addicted to alcohol he is a drunken sot; but if a rich man is oft intoxicated, he is afflicted with Dipsomania!  Interesting patient!  I should like to prescribe for him.  I feel sure I could do him good with my medicines—­the crank and water-gruel!