It is no wonder the novelists find it so difficult to invent an original plot.  Nothing seems to happen—­even in the future—­except the same old thing.  It is all as monotonous as North, South, East and West.  We turn with relief to the page on which Raphael tells us what are the best days on which to hire maidservants and to set turkeys.  Our interest redoubles when we come on his advice to those about to kill pigs.  “Do this,” he says, “between eight and ten in the morning, and between the first quarter and full of the Moon; the pigs will weigh more, and the flavour of the pork be improved.”  Then there are “Legal and Commercial Notes,” one of which—­“A bailiff must not break into a house, but he may enter by the chimney “—­suggests a subject for a drawing by Mr George Morrow.  The medical notes are equally worthy of consideration.  On one page we are given a list of herbal remedies, and we are told how one disease can be cured by pouring boiling water on hay (upland hay being better than meadow hay) and applying it to the stomach.  But Raphael is no crank, as we see in his suggestion for the treatment of influenza: 

“If you think you have got an attack of influenza slip off to bed at once and take the whisky or brandy bottle with you, and don’t be afraid of it, for alcohol is the best medicine you can take as it kills the germs in the blood.  Do not wait until you are half dead—­remember that a stitch in time saves nine, even with health.”

Even on the subject of the care of children’s teeth he makes it clear that, whoever may have come under the blight of Pussyfoot, it is not he: 

“I believe a Committee is to be appointed to inquire into the failing eyesight and decaying teeth in children.  I think I have already stated that these troubles were due to the excessive amount of sugar or sweetstuffs consumed.  All sweet things cause an excessive exudation of saliva from the gums, which affect and impair both the teeth and the eyesight for, despite of what dentist and doctor may say, there is an intimate relation between the two.  Dr Sims Wallace, the eminent lecturer on Dental Surgery, recommends Beer or dry Champagne as an excellent mouth wash.  They are also pleasant to the throat and stomach!”

The reader is now in a position to estimate for himself the extent to which he can rely on Raphael’s judgment, and to decide how far he will accept the horoscope Raphael has cast for Mr Lloyd George.  On this he writes: 

“This gentleman has figured so prominently in our national affairs for the last few years, that it may not be out of place if I give a few remarks on his horoscope.  The time of his birth is stated to have been January 17th, 1863, 8h. 55m.  A.M., but neither myself, nor other Astrologers, are satisfied with this hour.  I think he was born some minutes sooner.  At his birth the Sun was in exact Square to Jupiter, and also in Square to Mars, and Mars was in Opposition to Jupiter.  These are very ominous and important aspects.  The former denotes great extravagance, and waste of money, and the latter gives impetuosity, and danger to the person.”

He then proceeds to give a “brief analysis” of Mr Lloyd George’s horoscope: