Loung. Well, whatever he may say, I prefer Wimbledon.  And as there doesn’t seem much for me to do down here, I shall return to town. [Does so.  Curtain.

* * * * *

ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.

[Illustration:  Second Baron.]

House of Commons.  Monday, July 6.—­Don’t know what the House of Lords would do without WEMYSS.  How the House of Commons gets along without ELCHO is another story.  Of course we are not absolutely ELCHO-less.  Amurath has succeeded to Amurath, and there is still an ELCHO in the Commons.  Perhaps in time he may reach the towering height of his illustrious father.  He does very well as it is; made exceedingly smart speech the other afternoon on adjournment over Derby Day.  We try to bear up; make the best of things; but in our secret hearts confess that this century has seen but one Lord ELCHO, and now he’s Earl of WEMYSS.

Was in fine old style to-night.  DORCHESTER brought on question of Volunteers.  They are going to Wimbledon on Saturday to be reviewed by that veteran the German EMPEROR.  DORCHESTER, in modest, convincing speech, pointed out how unfair it was that, in addition to, in many cases, losing a day’s pay, in all cases incurring a day’s hard work, that Volunteers should be required to pay expenses of their trip to Wimbledon.  DORCHESTER left nothing unsaid; put the whole case in brief speech.  But WEMYSS not going to be left out.  Interposed in fine patronising manner; made acknowledgment of DORCHESTER’s good intention; but, suggesting an absolutely imaginary case, took exception to the presentation of the Volunteers in the light of asking for a day’s pay.  That, he said, would spoil the whole case.

No one had suggested anything of the kind.  WEMYSS had brought this nine-pin in with him as if it were one of a set of baccarat counters, had set it up, and was now knocking it down.  Noble Lords sat and stared in polite amazement.  CRANBROOK, in his impetuous way, jumped up and raised point of order.  WEMYSS put him aside with sweep of sword-arm, and went on to end of his speech, which showed who was the true friend of the Volunteer forces.

“Ah,” said young LAMINGTON, second Baron, regarding with pleased interest the flush of satisfaction that mantled WEMYSS’ brow when he resumed his seat, “this House would have been nothing only for us fellows coming in from the Commons.  It’s new blood that does it.  I’ll make them a speech myself some day.”

Business done.—­Quite a lot in the Commons.