the hat of a domestic alongside the coachman on the box.  ‘Tunder and turf!’ says I, preparing to descend, and give the scoundrels a taste of my blackthorn all round.  ’Whist! be aisy now, MICKY,’ says the Ambassador to me, in what is, betune ourselves, his own native tongue; and with that he picks up the loaf, sniffs at it, makes a wry face (’it’s a rye loaf,’ says I), and then says he, out loud, with a supercilious look, ‘Ill-bred!’ Begorra, there was a whoop o’ delight went up all round, which same was a sign of their purliteness, as divil a one of the ignoramuses could onderstand a wurrd the Court said in English or German, let alone Irish.  ‘Goot,’ says MUNSTER to me, dropping into his German accent, which, on occasion, comes quite natural to him—­the cratur!  ’I’ll give the loaf to the dog;’ and he whistles up the mastiff, own brother to BISMARCK’s.  ’Eh, MICKY, ye gossoon, isn’t the proverb, “Loaf me, loaf my dog"?’ Ah! then was cheers for ould Ireland, and a mighty big dhrink entirely we had that same night.

“Yours as ever, M.F.”

* * * * *

HERRICK UP TO DATE.

(AFTER “THE BRACELET TO JULIA.")

[Illustration]

Why tye I about thy wrist, JULIA, this my silken twist?  For what other reason is’t, But to show (in theorie) Thou sweet captive art to me; Which, of course, is fiddlededee!  Runne and aske the nearest Judge, He will tell thee ’tis pure fudge; When thou willest, thou mayst trudge; I’m thy Bondslave, Hymen’s pact Bindeth me in law and fact; Thou art free in will and act; ’Tis but silke that bindeth thee, Snap the thread, and thou art free:  But ’tis otherwise with me.  I am bound, and bound fast so That from thee I cannot go.  (Hah!  We’ll have this altered, though.  Man must be a wing-clipp’d goose If he bows to Hymen’s noose,—­ Heads you winne, and tails I lose!)

* * * * *

MAGAZINE MANNERS.

Editor to Eminent Writer.—­Review promises to be deadly slow next month.  Can you do something slashing for us?  Pitch into somebody or other—­you know the style.

Eminent Writer to Editor.—­Happy to oblige.  Got old article handy advocating cession of Canada and India to the French.  Never wrote anything more ripping.  Pitches into everybody.  Touching it up, and will let you have it in two days.  By the bye, telegraph people put a K to my Christian name.  Tell them not to do it again.

Editor to Eminent Writer (a week later).—­Sorry about the K. Got your article.  Not quite what I wanted.  Style all right, but arguments idiotic.  Can’t you take the other side?  Much more popular.

Eminent Writer to Editor.—­Idea insulting.  Any more telegrams of that sort, and I contribute in future to the Shortsprightly Review, not yours!

Editor to Eminent Writer.—­No offence meant. Is there any other Review besides mine?  Never heard of the one you mentioned.