To his horror, HICKS-BEACH heard GEDGE beginning to describe purport of his new Clause.  Was going to move it then?  Yes.  After moment’s horrified pause, Ministerialists broke into angry cries of, “Divide!” Opposition convulsed with laughter; HICKS-BEACH pale and stern, and stony silent; SYDNEY GEDGE flushed, conversational, dogged.  Even if Tithes Bill were lost he would explain the bearing of his new Clause.  Scene increasing in hilarity; lasted three minutes:  then Midnight sounded, and SYDNEY sat down, surprised to find he had talked out the Tithes Bill.

“You might have knocked me down with a feather,” said ALBERT ROLLIT, who, before opening his lips, had observed the precaution of propping himself up against the wall.  “GEDGE, of all men, to spoil the Ministerial plan, and imperil their arrangements for the week!  It’s all COURTNEY’s fault.  Since GEDGE tasted COURTNEY’s blood, on the night he interrupted his speech by chatting in the Chair with HERBERT GARDNER, GEDGE has never been the same man.  There’s no knowing to what lengths he may not go.”

Business done.—­SYDNEY GEDGE broken out again worse than ever.

Tuesday.—­MARJORIBANKS rather depressed as he rose to move his Resolution for appointment of Royal Commission on New Magazine Rifle.  Had hoped to appear under very different circumstances.  Meant quite to put in the shade LYON PLAYFAIR’s historic lecture on Margarine, when he had the tables covered with pots of that substance, with penny loaves and small knives for Members to sample withal.  For weeks MARJORIBANKS been preparing for occasion.  Had possessed himself of quite an armoury of rifles:  intended to bring them into the House and illustrate his lecture with practical experiments.  The climax was to be the shooting-off scene.  BOBBY SPENCER and ANSTRUTHER on in this.  BOBBY standing at the Bar with an apple held on palm of extended right hand; MARJORIBANKS, using Martini-Henry Rifle, was to clear the apple off, leaving BOBBY’s hair unsinged, and not a wrinkle added to his collar.  ANSTRUTHER was next to stand in the same place, braving the fire of the Magazine Rifle.  But he didn’t have an apple, as it was arranged that the new arm should jam.

[Illustration:  Standing Fire.]

“Suppose it doesn’t?” ANSTRUTHER inquired, when MARJORIBANKS first unfolded his scheme.

“Oh, that’ll be all right,” said MARJORIBANKS, cheerily.

Long practice on the Terrace made the arrangements perfect, when they were suddenly upset by interference from unexpected quarter.  The SPEAKER, wondering what all this rifle-popping was, came to hear of the project; at once said it wouldn’t do; no arms of any kind admitted in House of Commons, except the sword worn by SERGEANT-AT-ARMS, and once a year the lethal weapons carried by the Naval or Military gentlemen who move and second Address.  BOBBY SPENCER rather glad, I fancy; ANSTRUTHER not inconsolable.  But MARJORIBANKS distinctly depressed.