guess pretty nearly the range of their thoughts.
There yet remained to command her constancy, what she
valued more, the quality and affection proper to each.
But she could rarely find natures sufficiently deep
and magnetic. With her sleepless curiosity, her
magnanimity, and her diamond-ring, like Annie of Lochroyan’s,
to exchange for gold or for pewter, she might be pardoned
for her impatient questionings. To me, she was
uniformly generous; but neither did I escape.
Our moods were very different; and I remember, that,
at the very time when I, slow and cold, had come fully
to admire her genius, and was congratulating myself
on the solid good understanding that subsisted between
us, I was surprised with hearing it taxed by her with
superficiality and halfness. She stigmatized our
friendship as commercial. It seemed, her magnanimity
was not met, but I prized her only for the thoughts
and pictures she brought me;—so many thoughts,
so many facts yesterday,—so many to-day;—when
there was an end of things to tell, the game was up:
that, I did not know, as a friend should know, to
prize a silence as much as a discourse,—and
hence a forlorn feeling was inevitable; a poor counting
of thoughts, and a taking the census of virtues, was
the unjust reception so much love found. On one
occasion, her grief broke into words like these:
’The religious nature remained unknown to you,
because it could not proclaim itself, but claimed to
be divined. The deepest soul that approached
you was, in your eyes, nothing but a magic lantern,
always bringing out pretty shows of life.’
But as I did not understand the discontent then,—of
course, I cannot now. It was a war of temperaments,
and could not be reconciled by words; but, after each
party had explained to the uttermost, it was necessary
to fall back on those grounds of agreement which remained
and leave the differences henceforward in respectful
silence. The recital may still serve to show
to sympathetic persons the true lines and enlargements
of her genius. It is certain that this incongruity
never interrupted for a moment the intercourse, such
as it was, that existed between us.
I ought to add here, that certain mental changes brought
new questions into conversation. In the summer
of 1840, she passed into certain religious states,
which did not impress me as quite healthy, or likely
to be permanent; and I said, “I do not understand
your tone; it seems exaggerated. You are one
who can afford to speak and to hear the truth.
Let us hold hard to the common-sense, and let us speak
in the positive degree.”
And I find, in later letters from her, sometimes playful,
sometimes grave allusions to this explanation.
’Is —— there?
Does water meet water?—no need of wine,
sugar, spice, or even a soupcon of lemon
to remind of a tropical climate? I fear me
not. Yet, dear positives, believe me superlatively
yours, MARGARET.’
The following letter seems to refer, under an Eastern
guise, and with something of Eastern exaggeration
of compliment too, to some such native sterilities
in her correspondent:—–