‘Ho!’ said the constable, looking carefully at his fingers as though we had trapped them.  ‘That won’t do you any good either,’ and he wrote once more in his note-book before he allowed us to go.

This was Woodhouse’s first brush with motor law, and since I expected no ill consequences to myself, I pointed out that it was very serious.  I took the same view myself when in due time I found that I, too, was summonsed on charges ranging from the use of obscene language to endangering traffic.

Judgment was done in a little pale-yellow market-town with a small, Jubilee clock-tower and a large corn-exchange.  Woodhouse drove us there in his car.  Pallant, who had not been included in the summons, came with us as moral support.  While we waited outside, the fat man on the grey horse rode up and entered into loud talk with his brother magistrates.  He said to one of them—­for I took the trouble to note it down—­’It falls away from my lodge-gates, dead straight, three-quarters of a mile.  I’d defy any one to resist it.  We rooked seventy pounds out of ’em last month.  No car can resist the temptation.  You ought to have one your side the county, Mike.  They simply can’t resist it.’

‘Whew!’ said Woodhouse.  ’We’re in for trouble.  Don’t you say a word—­or Ollyett either!  I’ll pay the fines and we’ll get it over as soon as possible.  Where’s Pallant?’

‘At the back of the court somewhere,’ said Ollyett.  ’I saw him slip in just now.’

The fat man then took his seat on the Bench, of which he was chairman, and I gathered from a bystander that his name was Sir Thomas Ingell, Bart., M.P., of Ingell Park, Huckley.  He began with an allocution pitched in a tone that would have justified revolt throughout empires.  Evidence, when the crowded little court did not drown it with applause, was given in the pauses of the address.  They were all very proud of their Sir Thomas, and looked from him to us, wondering why we did not applaud too.

Taking its time from the chairman, the Bench rollicked with us for seventeen minutes.  Sir Thomas explained that he was sick and tired of processions of cads of our type, who would be better employed breaking stones on the road than in frightening horses worth more than themselves or their ancestors.  This was after it had been proved that Woodhouse’s man had turned on the horn purposely to annoy Sir Thomas, who happened to be riding by’!  There were other remarks too—­primitive enough,—­but it was the unspeakable brutality of the tone, even more than the quality of the justice, or the laughter of the audience that stung our souls out of all reason.  When we were dismissed—­to the tune of twenty-three pounds, twelve shillings and sixpence—­we waited for Pallant to join us, while we listened to the next case—­one of driving without a licence.  Ollyett with an eye to his evening paper, had already taken very full notes of our own, but we did not wish to seem prejudiced.