Having taken this step, Eugenia saw that my attachment was not to be overcome; that I was willing to make any sacrifice for her.  I was accepted; my salary was fixed at one guinea per week, with seven shillings extra for playing the flute.  I was indebted for my ready admission into this society to my voice:  the manager wanted a first singer.  My talent in this science was much admired.  I signed my agreement the same evening for two months; and, being presented in due form to my brethren of the buskin, joined the supper-table, where there was more of abundance than of delicacies.  I sat by Eugenia, whose decided preference for me excited the jealousy of my new associates.  I measured them all with my eye, and calculated that, with fair play, I was the best man among them.

The play-bills announced the tragedy of “Romeo and Juliet.”  I was to be the hero, and four days were allowed me to prepare myself.  The whole of that time was passed in the company of Eugenia, who, while she gave me unequivocal proofs of attachment, admitted of no freedom.  The day of rehearsal arrived, I was found perfect, and loudly applauded by the company.  Six o’clock came, the curtain rose, and sixteen tallow candles displayed my person to an audience of about one hundred people.

No one who has not been in the situation can form any idea of the nervous feeling of a debutant on such an occasion.  The troupe, with the exception of Eugenia, was of a description of persons whom I despise, and the audience mostly clodhoppers, who could scarcely read or write; yet I was abashed, and acquitted myself badly, until the balcony scene, when I became enlivened and invigorated by the presence and smiles of my mistress.  In the art of love-making I was at home, particularly with the Juliet of that night.  I entered at once into the spirit of the great dramatist, and the curtain dropped amidst thunders of applause.  My name was announced for a repetition of the play, and I was dragged forward before the curtain, to thank the grocers, tallow-chandlers, cheesemongers, and ploughmen for the great honour they had done me.  Heavens! how I felt the degradation; but it was too late.

The natural result of this constant intercourse with Eugenia may easily be anticipated.  I do not attempt to extenuate my fault—­it was inexcusable, and has brought its punishment; but for poor, forlorn Eugenia I plead; her virtue fell before my importunity and my personal appearance.  She fell a victim to those unhappy circumstances of which I basely took the advantage.

Two months I had lived with her, as man and wife; I forgot my family, profession, and even Emily.  I was now upon the ship’s books; and though no one knew anything of me, my father was ignorant of my absence from the ship—­everything was sacrificed to Eugenia.  I acted with her, strolled the fields, and vowed volumes of stuff about constancy.  When we played, we filled the house; and some of the more respectable townspeople offered to introduce us to the London boards, but this we both declined.  We cared for nothing but the society of each other.