I went into the country, about fifteen miles from Quebec, where I had heard of a crimp’s preserve, and after a tedious search, discovered some good seamen on the rafters of an outhouse intended only to smoke and cure bacon; and as the fires were lighted, and the smoke ascending, it was difficult to conceive a human being could exist there:  nor should we have discovered them if one of them had not coughed; on which he received the execrations of the others, and the whole party was instantly handed out.  We immediately cut the strings of their trowsers behind, to prevent their running away, (this ought never to be omitted), and, placing them and ourselves in the farmer’s waggon, made him put his team to and drive us all to Quebec, the new-raised men joining with our own in all the jokes which flew thick about on the occasion of their discovery.  It was astonishing to me how easily these fine fellows reconciled themselves to the thoughts of a man-of-war; perhaps the approaching row with the Yankees tended very much to preserve good humour.  I became an enthusiast in man-hunting, although sober reflection has since convinced me of its cruelty, injustice, and inexpediency, tending to drive seamen from the country more than any measure the government could adopt; but I am not going to write a treatise on impressment.  I cared not one farthing about the liberty of the subject, as long as I got my ship well manned for the impending conflict; and as I gratified my love of adventure, I was as thoughtless of the consequences as when I rode over a farmer’s turnips in England, or broke through his hedges in pursuit of a fox.

A tradesman at Quebec had affronted me, by refusing to discount a bill which I had drawn on my father.  I had no other means of paying him for the goods I had purchased of him, and was much disconcerted at his refusal, which he accompanied with an insult to myself and my cloth, never to be forgotten.  Turning the paper over and over, he said, “a midshipman’s bill is not worth a farthing, and I am too old a bird to be caught with such chaff.”

Conscious that the bill was good, I vowed revenge.  My search-warrant enabled me to go wherever I could get information of men being concealed—­this was easily obtained from a brother mid (the poor man might as well have been in the hands of the holy brotherhood).  My companion stated his firm conviction that sailors were concealed in the house; I applied to the captain, and received orders to proceed by all means in execution of my duty.  The tradesman was a man of consequence in Quebec, being what is there called a large storekeeper, though we in England should have called him a shopkeeper.  About one o’clock in the morning we hammered at his door with no gentle tap, demanding admittance in the name of our sovereign lord the king.  We were refused, and forthwith broke open the door, and spread over his house like a nest of cockroaches.  Cellars, garrets, maids’ room, ladies’ rooms, we entered, sans ceremonie; paid little regard to the Medicean costume of the fair occupants; broke some of the most indispensable articles of bedroom furniture; rattled the pots and pans about in the kitchen; and, finding the two sons of the master of the house, ordered them to dress and come with us, certain, we said, that they were sailors.