“Well, my dear,” said Mrs Feasible, “what do you think of this?  Very unhandsome on the part of Doctor Plausible!  I was told this morning that several of our acquaintances have expressed a wish to be introduced to him.”

“We must not give up the point, my love.  Doctor Plausible may make a splash once; but I suspect that his horses eat him out of house and home, and interfere very much with the butcher’s bills.  If so, we who keep no carriage can afford it better.  But it’s very annoying, as there will be an increase of expense.”

“Very annoying, indeed!” replied the lady.  “Look at his card, my dear, it is nearly twice as large as ours.  I begged it of Mr Tomkins, on purpose to compare it.”

“Well, then, my dear, we must order others, and mind that they measure an inch more than his.  It shall cost him something before we have done, I’m determined.”

“You heard what Mr Smithson said?  They gave negus and cherry-water.”

“We must do the same.  I’ve a great mind to give ices.”

“Oh! my love, remember the expense.”

“Very true; but we can ice our negus and cherry-water.  Rough ice is only twopence a pound, I believe.”

“Well, that will be an improvement.”

“And there shall be more, or I’ll be in the Bench,” replied the doctor, in his wrath.

The next conversazione for which cards were issued by Doctor Feasible, was on a superior scale.  There was a considerable increase of company.  He had persuaded a country baronet; secured the patronage of two ladies of rank (with a slight blot on their escutcheons), and collected, amongst others, a French count (or adventurer), a baron with mustachios, two German students in their costumes and long hair, and an actress of some reputation.  He had also procured the head of a New Zealand chief; some red snow, or rather, red water (for it was melted), brought home by Captain Ross; a piece of granite from the Croker mountains; a kitten in spirits, with two heads and twelve legs; and half-a-dozen abortions of the feathered or creeping tribes.  Everything went off well.  The two last fees he had received were sacrificed to have the party announced in the Morning Post, and Doctor Feasible’s triumph was complete.

But it was not to last long.  In ten days Dr Plausible’s cards were again issued, larger than Dr Feasible’s, and with a handsome embossed border of lilies and roses.  Male attendants, tea and coffee, ices and liqueurs were prepared; and Dr Feasible’s heart failed him, when he witnessed the ingress and egress of the pastrycooks, with their boxes on their heads.  Among his company he had already mustered up five celebrated blues; four ladies of quality, of better reputation than Dr Feasible’s; seven or eight baronets and knights; a bishop of Fernando Po; three or four general officers; and a dozen French and German visitors to the country, who had not only titles, but wore orders at their button-holes.  Thus far had he advanced, when he met Newton Forster, and added him to the list of the invited.  In about two hours afterwards, Dr Plausible returned home to his wife, radiant with smiles.