were equally indignant:  in short, the whole Portuguese population of the island were in arms; but the old lady, who had always contrived to have her way before her husband’s death, was not inclined to be thwarted now that she was her own mistress; and, notwithstanding threats and expostulations from all quarters, she awaited but the arrival of an English man-of-war that the ceremony might be performed, there being at that time no Protestant clergyman on the island; for the reader must know that a marriage on board of a king’s ship, by the captain, duly entered in the log-book, is considered as valid as if the ceremony were performed by the Archbishop of Canterbury.

I once married a couple on board of a little ten-gun brig of which I condescended to take the command, to oblige the first lord of the Admiralty; offered, I believe, to provide for me, and rid the Board of all future solicitations for employment or promotion.

It was one of my sailors, who had come to a determination to make an honest woman of Poll and an ass of himself at one and the same time.  The ceremony took place on the quarter-deck.  “Who gives this woman away?” said I, with due emphasis, according to the ritual.  “I do,” cried the boatswain, in a gruff voice, taking the said lady by the arm and shoving her towards me, as if he thought her not worth keeping.  Everything went on seriously, nevertheless.  The happy pair were kneeling down on the union-jack, which had been folded on the deck in consideration of the lady’s knees, and I was in the middle of the blessing, when two pigs, which we had procured at St Jago’s, being then off that island (creatures more like English pigs on stilts than anything else, unless you could imagine a cross between a pig and a greyhound), in the lightness of their hearts and happy ignorance of their doom, took a frisk, as you often see pigs do on shore, commenced a run from forward right aft, and galloping to the spot where we were all collected, rushed against the two just made one, destroying their centre of gravity, and upsetting them; and, indeed, destroying the gravity and upsetting the seriousness of myself and the whole of the ship’s company.  The lady recovered her legs, d—­d the pigs, and, taking her husband’s arm, hastened down the hatchway; so that I lost the kiss to which I was entitled for my services.  I consoled myself by the reflection that, “please the pigs,” I might be more fortunate the next time that I officiated in my clerical capacity.  This is a digression, I grant, but I cannot help it; it is the nature of man to digress.  Who can say that he has through life kept in the straight path?  This is a world of digression; and I beg that critics will take no notice of mine, as I have an idea that my digressions in this work are as agreeable to my readers, as my digressions in life have been agreeable to myself.