“I am sorry that your good fortune should be coupled with such a drawback.”

“Oh, it’s nothing!  It’s just to a man what a clog is to a horse in a field—­you know pretty well where to find him.  I’m so used to it—­indeed so much so, that I should feel rather uncomfortable if I had nothing on my hands:  just keeps me from being idle.  I’ve been into every court in the metropolis, and have no fault to find with one of them, except the Court of R------ts.”

“And pray, sir, what is that court, and the objection you have to it?”

“Why, as to the court, it’s the most confounded ras------; but I must be
careful how I speak before strangers:  you’ll excuse me, sir; not that I
suspect you, but I know what may be considered as a libel.  I shall,
therefore, just state that it is a court at which no gentleman can
appear; and if he does, it’s of no use, for he’ll never get a verdict in
his favour.”

“What, then it is not a court of justice?”

“Court of justice! no, it’s a court for the recovery of small debts; but I’ll just tell you, sir, exactly what took place with me in that court, and then you will be able to judge for yourself.  I had a dog, sir; it was just after I came into my property; his name was Caesar, and a very good dog he was.  Well, sir, riding out one day about four miles from town, a rabbit put his nose out of a cellar, where they retailed potatoes.  Caesar pounced upon him, and the rabbit was dead in a moment.  The man who owned the rabbit and the potatoes, came up to me and asked my name, which I told him; at the same time I expressed my sorrow at the accident, and advised him in future to keep his rabbits in hutches.  He said he would, and demanded three shillings and sixpence for the one which the dog had killed.  Now, although he was welcome to advice, money was quite another thing; so he went one way muttering something about law, and I another, with Caesar at my heels, taking no notice of his threat.  Well, sir, in a few days my servant came up to say that somebody wished to see me upon particular business, and I ordered him to be shown up.  It was a blackguard-looking fellow, who put a piece of dirty paper in my hand; summoned me to appear at some dog-hole or another, I forget where.  Not understanding the business, I enclosed it to a legal friend, who returned an answer, that it was a summons to the Court of R——­ts; that no gentleman could go there; and that I had better let the thing take its course.  I had forgotten all about it, when, in a few days, a piece of paper was brought to me, by which I found that the court adjudged me to pay L1 2s. 6d., for damages and costs.  I asked who brought it, and was told it was the son of the potato-merchant, accompanied by a tipstaff.  I requested the pleasure of their company, and asked the legal gentleman what it was for.

“’Eighteen shillings for ten rabbits destroyed by your dog, and 4s. 6d. for costs of court.’