It may not perhaps be improper to mention one very remarkable personage, I mean “the Wooden Spoon.”  This luckless wight (for what cause I know not) is annually the universal butt and laughing-stock of the whole Senate-House.  He is the last of those young men who take honors, in his year, and is called a Junior Optime; yet, notwithstanding his being in fact superior to them all, the very lowest of the [Greek:  oi polloi], or gregarious undistinguished bachelors, think themselves entitled to shoot the pointless arrows of their clumsy wit against the wooden spoon; and to reiterate the stale and perennial remark, that “Wranglers are born with gold spoons in their mouths, Senior Optimes with silver, Junior Optimes with wooden, and the [Greek:  oi polloi] with leaden ones.”—­Gent.  Mag., 1795, p. 19.

  Who while he lives must wield the boasted prize,
  Whose value all can feel, the weak, the wise;
  Displays in triumph his distinguished boon,
  The solid honors of the wooden spoon.
    Grad. ad Cantab., p. 119.

2.  At Yale College, this title is conferred on the student who takes the last appointment at the Junior Exhibition.  The following account of the ceremonies incident to the presentation of the Wooden Spoon has been kindly furnished by a graduate of that institution.

“At Yale College the honors, or, as they are there termed, appointments, are given to a class twice during the course;—­upon the merits of the two preceding years, at the end of the first term, Junior; and at the end of the second term, Senior, upon the merits of the whole college course.  There are about eight grades of appointments, the lowest of which is the Third Colloquy.  Each grade has its own standard, and if a number of students have attained to the same degree, they receive the same appointment.  It is rarely the case, however, that more than one student can claim the distinction of a third colloquy; but when there are several, they draw lots to see which is entitled to be considered properly the third colloquy man.

“After the Junior appointments are awarded, the members of the Junior Class hold an exhibition similar to the regular Junior exhibition, and present a wooden spoon to the man who received the lowest honor in the gift of the Faculty.

“The exhibition takes place in the evening, at some public hall in town.  Except to those engaged in the arrangements, nothing is known about it among the students at large, until the evening of the performances, when notices of the hour and place are quietly circulated at prayers, in order that it may not reach the ears of the Faculty, who are ever too ready to participate in the sports of the students, and to make the result tell unfavorably against the college welfare of the more prominent characters.

“As the appointed hour approaches, long files of black coats may be seen emerging from the dark halls, and winding their way through the classic elms towards the Temple, the favorite scene of students’ exhibitions and secret festivals.  When they reach the door, each man must undergo the searching scrutiny of the door-keeper, usually disguised as an Indian, to avoid being recognized by a college officer, should one chance to be in the crowd, and no one is allowed to enter unless he is known.