One day the huge form of the Speaker of the House of Representatives loomed up before the little editor, with the evident intent of bearing down upon the private office.

“Back!” shouted the little editor, waving a slender arm with much vigor.  “Back!  Go back to the offith and thend in your card.”

The Congressman paused, inclined his head to view the obstacle that opposed his progress, and smiled.  Then he turned on his heel and did as he was directed.

Of course the publisher bustled out personally to conduct the great man into the private office.  When his visitor had departed the publisher came forth in a rage.  The little editor shriveled before him as he began: 

“What do you mean by holding up one of my oldest friends in this fashion?  Don’t you know he’s at perfect liberty to walk into my office at any time without so much as knocking?”

“Yeth,” admitted the little editor feebly.

“Then what do you mean by holding him up and subjecting him to such discourtesy ?”

“I thought he wath Dr. John Hall.”

“Dr. John Hall!” exclaimed the exasperated publisher “Don’t you know that Dr. John Hall is dead?”

“Yeth,” returned the little editor with earnest sincerity.  “That’th what bothered me.”

Willie’s April Fool on Mamma!

Little Willie had a very pretty governess, and on April first he rather startled his mother by rushing in to her and saying: 

“Mamma, there’s a strange man upstairs who has just put his arm around Miss Wilson’s waist, and kissed her several times——­”

“What?” said the mother, as she jumped up to pull the bell for the butler.

“April fool, Mamma!” said Willie, in great glee.  “It wasn’t a strange man at all.  It was Papa!”

Full Particulars Given

A small boy who had recently passed his fifth birthday was riding in a suburban car with his mother, when they were asked the customary question, “How old is the boy?” After being told the correct age, which did not require a fare, the conductor passed on to the next person.

The boy sat quite still as if pondering over some question, and then, concluding that full information had not been given, called loudly to the conductor, then at the other end of the car:  “And mother’s thirty-one!”

News for the Bishop

A newly-rich woman, who was anxious to make a favorable impression in her neighborhood, decided to show her collection of antiques to the Bishop when he called.  The time came, and one by one she displayed the whole collection, giving him the history of each piece.  Finally she pointed to the most prized article in the lot.  “There,” she said, pointing impressively to an old yellow teapot.  “That teapot was used in the Boston Tea-party.”

A Case of Mutual Application

MR. WOOD, a man very fond of playing jokes, met his friend, Mr. Stone, and at once inquired jocosely: