Thou first of our orators,
first of our wits;
Yet whose parts and
acquirements seem just lucky hits;
With knowledge so vast,
and with judgment so strong,
No man with the half
of ’em e’er could go wrong;
With passions so potent,
and fancies so bright,
No man with the half
of ’em e’er could go right;
A sorry, poor, misbegot
son of the Muses,
For using thy name,
offers fifty excuses.
Good Lord, what is Man!
for as simple he looks,
Do but try to develop
his hooks and his crooks;
With his depths and
his shallows, his good and his evil,
All in all he’s
a problem must puzzle the devil.
On his one ruling passion
Sir Pope hugely labours,
That, like th’
old Hebrew walking-switch, eats up its neighbours:
Mankind are his show-box—a
friend, would you know him?
Pull the string, Ruling
Passion the picture will show him,
What pity, in rearing
so beauteous a system,
One trifling particular,
Truth, should have miss’d him;
For, spite of his fine
theoretic positions,
Mankind is a science
defies definitions.
Some sort all our qualities
each to its tribe,
And think human nature
they truly describe;
Have you found this,
or t’other? There’s more in the wind;
As by one drunken fellow
his comrades you’ll find.
But such is the flaw,
or the depth of the plan,
In the make of that
wonderful creature called Man,
No two virtues, whatever
relation they claim.
Nor even two different
shades of the same,
Though like as was ever
twin brother to brother,
Possessing the one shall
imply you’ve the other.
But truce with abstraction,
and truce with a Muse
Whose rhymes you’ll
perhaps, Sir, ne’er deign to peruse:
Will you leave your
justings, your jars, and your quarrels,
Contending with Billy
for proud-nodding laurels?
My much-honour’d
Patron, believe your poor poet,
Your courage, much more
than your prudence, you show it:
In vain with Squire
Billy for laurels you struggle:
He’ll have them
by fair trade, if not, he will smuggle:
Not cabinets even of
kings would conceal ’em,
He’d up the back
stairs, and by God, he would steal ’em,
Then feats like Squire
Billy’s you ne’er can achieve ’em;
It is not, out-do him—the
task is, out-thieve him!
The Wounded Hare
Inhuman man! curse on
thy barb’rous art,
And blasted be thy murder-aiming
eye;
May never pity soothe
thee with a sigh,
Nor ever pleasure glad
thy cruel heart!
Go live, poor wand’rer
of the wood and field!
The bitter little that
of life remains:
No more the thickening
brakes and verdant plains
To thee a home, or food,
or pastime yield.