own? Take one day; share it into sections; to
each section apportion its task: leave no stray
unemployed quarters of an hour, ten minutes, five minutes
— include all; do each piece of business
in its turn with method, with rigid regularity.
The day will close almost before you are aware it
has begun; and you are indebted to no one for helping
you to get rid of one vacant moment: you have
had to seek no one’s company, conversation,
sympathy, forbearance; you have lived, in short, as
an independent being ought to do. Take this advice:
the first and last I shall offer you; then you will
not want me or any one else, happen what may.
Neglect it — go on as heretofore, craving,
whining, and idling — and suffer the results
of your idiocy, however bad and insuperable they may
be. I tell you this plainly; and listen:
for though I shall no more repeat what I am now about
to say, I shall steadily act on it. After my
mother’s death, I wash my hands of you:
from the day her coffin is carried to the vault in
Gateshead Church, you and I will be as separate as
if we had never known each other. You need not
think that because we chanced to be born of the same
parents, I shall suffer you to fasten me down by even
the feeblest claim: I can tell you this —
if the whole human race, ourselves excepted, were swept
away, and we two stood alone on the earth, I would
leave you in the old world, and betake myself to the
new.”
She closed her lips.
“You might have spared yourself the trouble
of delivering that tirade,” answered Georgiana.
“Everybody knows you are the most selfish,
heartless creature in existence: and I know your
spiteful hatred towards me: I have had a specimen
of it before in the trick you played me about Lord
Edwin Vere: you could not bear me to be raised
above you, to have a title, to be received into circles
where you dare not show your face, and so you acted
the spy and informer, and ruined my prospects for
ever.” Georgiana took out her handkerchief
and blew her nose for an hour afterwards; Eliza sat
cold, impassable, and assiduously industrious.
True, generous feeling is made small account of by
some, but here were two natures rendered, the one
intolerably acrid, the other despicably savourless
for the want of it. Feeling without judgment
is a washy draught indeed; but judgment untempered
by feeling is too bitter and husky a morsel for human
deglutition.
It was a wet and windy afternoon: Georgiana
had fallen asleep on the sofa over the perusal of
a novel; Eliza was gone to attend a saint’s-day
service at the new church — for in matters
of religion she was a rigid formalist: no weather
ever prevented the punctual discharge of what she
considered her devotional duties; fair or foul, she
went to church thrice every Sunday, and as often on
week-days as there were prayers.