I am yours.

Letter 70.

My doubts and fears were not at all increased by that which gives you so many, nor did I apprehend that your father might not have been prevailed with to have allowed my brother’s being seen in the treaty; for as to the thing itself, whether he appears in’t or not, ’twill be the same.  He cannot but conclude my brother Peyton would not do anything in it without the others’ consent.

I do not pretend to any share in your father’s kindness, as having nothing in me to merit it; but as much a stranger as I am to him, I should have taken it very ill if I had desired it of him, and he had refused it me.  I do not believe my brother has said anything to his prejudice, unless it were in his persuasions to me, and there it did not injure him at all.  If he takes it ill that my brother appears so very averse to the match, I may do so too, that he was the same; and nothing less than my kindness for you could have made me take so patiently as I did his saying to some that knew me at York that he was forced to bring you thither and afterwards to send you over lest you should have married me.  This was not much to my advantage, nor hardly civil, I think, to any woman; yet I never so much as took the least notice on’t, nor had not now, but for this occasion; yet, sure, it concerns me to be at least as nice as he in point of honour.  I think ’tis best for me to end here lest my anger should make me lose that respect I would always have for your father, and ’twere not amiss, I think, that I devoted it all towards you for being so idle as to run out of your bed to catch such a cold.

If you come hither you must expect to be chidden so much that you will wish that you had stayed till we came up, when perhaps I might have almost forgot half my quarrel to you.  At this present I can assure you I am pleased with nobody but your sister, and her I love extremely, and will call her pretty; say what you will, I know she must be so, though I never saw more of her than what her letters show.  She shall have two “spots” [carriage dogs] if she please (for I had just such another given me after you were gone), or anything else that is in the power of

Yours.

Letter 71.

Monday, October the 2nd [1654].

After a long debate with myself how to satisfy you and remove that rock (as you call it), which in your apprehensions is of so great danger, I am at last resolved to let you see that I value your affections for me at as high a rate as you yourself can set it, and that you cannot have more of tenderness for me and my interests than I shall ever have for yours.  The particulars how I intend to make this good you shall know when I see you; which since I find them here more irresolute in point of time (though not as to the journey itself) than I hoped they would have been, notwithstanding your quarrel to me, and the apprehension you would make me believe you had that I do not care to see you, pray come hither and try whether you shall be welcome or not!  In sober earnest now I must speak with you; and to that end if your occasions will [serve] come down to Canterbury.  Send some one when you are there, and you shall have further directions.