Our host and hostess were plain honest good farming people, and appeared desirous to do every thing they could for Captain Lyon, but for all that, they could not be roused out of their accustomed methodical manner, and the preparation of our meal was, to them, a business of serious delay and labour.

  And all entreaties were vain,
  For they’d promise and promise again,
  But still go on the same.

My friends, therefore, were compelled to take policy for their counsellor, and patience for their remedy.  The most provoking part of the affair was, that they were expected to consider themselves obliged, by the condescension of their hosts, in undertaking upon any terms to minister to their necessities:  consequently there was no possibility of giving utterance to any hasty feelings of impatience; no opening for those little outbreaks of anger so common to hungry gentlemen.  These, might they have been indulged, would have amused, as well as comforted the sufferers, but unhappy travellers! they were compelled to

  Let keen hunger, like a worm in the bud,
  Feed on their inner man.

Here, however, our accommodations were quite superior, when compared with what we had found at other resting-places; indeed they did not profess to “accommodate travellers,” an assurance which is I presume intended to reconcile the guest to such reception as they choose to give:  but if these people are unwilling to “profess,” they do not allow their scruples to limit their expectations; these are always directed towards a recompense, which they are just as eager to receive as those who accord more to the convenience of the stranger.

Their curiosity is also unparalleled, and when you dismount you are received with a string of questions; respecting your health.  Where you have been?  The news of Rio?  Whom you have met on the road?  Who are expected to go up? or down the country? &c. &c.  Having obtained all the information your patience will grant, they at length begin to consider what provision they can make for you, and generally commence operations by slaughtering a few fowls, (or sometimes a turkey or a roasting pig;) then a large pot of water must be boiled to dip the fowls in, by way of removing the feathers in the most expeditious manner; a practical bull, for if they plucked the birds the moment they were dead, and before the body was allowed to cool, the process would be completed in less time than they could boil the water.  After this preparation, they proceed with their tedious cookery, all of which is conducted in an equally awkward manner.  Sometimes after arriving in the evening, tired and hungry, three or four hours elapsed, before any knives and forks were put on the table, or any other visible progress made in the arrangement of our meal:  and not unfrequently my companions gave the matter up in despair, and resigned themselves to sleep, while all were completely worn out with waiting, long before the dinner appeared.