recovered his good humour, as he stopped him and said, “Sir, I would like to speer a question at ye on a subject that’s troubling me.”  “Well, Johnnie, what is the question?” To which he replied, “Sir, is it lawful at ony time to tell a lee?” The minister desired to know what Johnnie himself thought upon the point.  “Weel, sir,” said he, “I’ll no say but in every case it’s wrang to tell a lee; but,” added he, looking archly and giving a knowing wink, “I think there are waur lees than ithers” “How, Johnnie?” and then he instantly replied, with all the simplicity of a fool, “To keep down a din, for instance.  I’ll no say but a man does wrang in telling a lee to keep down a din, but I’m sure he does not do half sae muckle wrang as a man who tells a lee to kick up a deevilment o’ a din.”  This opened a question not likely to occur to such a mind.  Mr. Asher, minister of Inveraven, in Morayshire, narrated to Dr. Paul a curious example of want of intelligence combined with a power of cunning to redress a fancied wrong, shown by a poor natural of the parish, who had been seized with a violent inflammatory attack, and was in great danger.  The medical attendant saw it necessary to bleed him, but he resisted, and would not submit to it.  At last the case became so hopeless that they were obliged to use force, and, holding his hands and feet, the doctor opened a vein and drew blood, upon which the poor creature, struggling violently, bawled out, “O doctor, doctor! you’ll kill me! you’ll kill me! and depend upon it the first thing I’ll do when I get to the other world will be to report you to the board of Supervision there, and get you dismissed.”  A most extraordinary sensation was once produced on a congregation by Rab Hamilton, a well-remembered crazy creature of the west country, on the occasion of his attendance at the parish kirk of “Auld Ayr, wham ne’er a toun surpasses,” the minister of which, in the opinion of Rab’s own minister, Mr. Peebles, had a tendency to Socinian doctrines.  Miss Kirkwood, Bothwell, relates the story from the recollection of her aunt, who was present.  Rab had put his head between some iron rails, the first intimation of which to the congregation was a stentorian voice crying out, “Murder! my heed’ll hae to be cuttit aff!  Holy minister! congregation!  Oh, my heed maun be cuttit aff.  It’s a judgment for leaving my godlie Mr. Peebles at the Newton.”  After he had been extricated and quieted, when asked why he put his head there, he said, “It was juist to look on[170] wi’ anither woman.”

The following anecdote of this same Rab Hamilton from a kind correspondent at Ayr sanctions the opinion that he must have occasionally said such clever things as made some think him more rogue than fool.  Dr. Auld often showed him kindness, but being once addressed by him when in a hurry and out of humour, he said, “Get away, Rab; I have nothing for you to day.”  “Whaw, whew,” cried Rab, in a half howl, half whining tone, “I dinna