“But even worse things were in store for me.  The fortunes of our house were declining.  My youngest brother, a headstrong, impetuous fellow, was an officer in a regiment of dragoons.  As the result of a reckless wager, he foolishly swam the Danube, mounted and in full armor, while heated from the exertion of a ride.  This escapade, which occurred while he was far away in Hungary, cost him his life.  My older brother, my father’s favorite, held an appointment as a member of provincial council.  In constant opposition to the governor of the province, he even went so far as to promulgate untruthful statements in order to injure his opponent, being secretly incited thereto, as rumor had it, by our father.  An investigation followed, and my brother took French leave of the country.  Our father’s enemies, of whom there were many, utilized this circumstance to bring about his downfall.  Attacked on all sides, and at the same time enraged at the waning of his influence, he delivered daily the most bitter speeches at the meetings of the council, and it was in the middle of a speech that he suffered a stroke of apoplexy.  They brought him home, bereft of the power of speech.  I myself heard nothing of all this.  The next day in the chancery I noticed that the men were whispering secretly and pointing at me with their fingers.  But I was accustomed to such treatment and paid no further attention to it.  On the following Friday—­the sad event had occurred on a Wednesday—­a black suit of clothes with crepe was suddenly brought to my room.  I was naturally astonished, asked for the reason, and was informed of what had taken place.  Ordinarily my body is strong and capable of resistance, but then I was completely overcome.  I fell to the floor in a swoon.  They carried me to bed, where I lay in a fever and was delirious throughout the day and the entire night.  The next morning my strong constitution had conquered, but my father was dead and buried.

“I had not been able to speak to him again, to ask his forgiveness for all the sorrow I had brought upon him, or to thank him for all the undeserved favors—­yes, favors, for his intentions had been good; and some time I hope to meet him again where we are judged by our intentions and not by our acts.

“For several days I kept my room and scarcely touched any food.  At last I went out, but came home again immediately after dinner.  Only in the evening I wandered about the dark streets like Cain, the murderer of his brother.  My father’s house appeared to me a dreadful phantom, and I avoided it most carefully.  But once, staring vacantly before me, I found myself unexpectedly in the vicinity of the dreaded house.  My knees trembled so that I was obliged to seek support.  Leaning against the wall behind me, I recognized the door of the grocery store.  Barbara was sitting inside, a letter in her hand, the light upon the counter beside her, and standing up straight close by was her father, who seemed