—­Robert Browning.

  May you live as long as you like,
  And have what you like as long as you live.

  “Live, while you live,” the epicure would say,
  “And seize the pleasures of the present day;”
  “Live, while you live,” the sacred Preacher cries,
  “And give to God each moment as it flies.” 
  “Lord, in my views let both united be;
  I live in pleasure, when I live to Thee.”

  —­Philip Doddridge.

  This world that we’re a-livin’ in
    Is mighty hard to beat,
  For you get a thorn with every rose—­
    But ain’t the roses sweet!

Dost thou love life?  Then do not squander time, for that is the stuff life is made of.—­Benjamin Franklin.

LISPING

“Have you lost another tooth, Bethesda?” asked auntie, who noticed an unusual lisp.

“Yes’m,” replied the four-year-old, “and I limp now when I talk.”

LOST AND FOUND

“I ain’t losing any faith in human nature,” said Uncle Eben, “but I kain’t he’p noticin’ dat dere’s allus a heap mo’ ahticles advertised ‘Lost’ dan dar is ‘Found.’”

“What were you in for?” asked the friend.

“I found a horse.”

“Found a horse?  Nonsense!  They wouldn’t jug you for finding a horse.”

“Well, but you see I found him before the owner lost him.”

“Party that lost purse containing twenty dollars need worry no longer—­it has been found.”—­Brooklyn Life.

A lawyer having offices in a large office building recently lost a cuff-link, one of a pair that he greatly prized.  Being absolutely certain that he had dropped the link somewhere in the building he posted this notice: 

“Lost.  A gold cuff-link.  The owner, William Ward, will deeply appreciate its immediate return.”

That afternoon, on passing the door whereon this notice was posted, what were the feelings of the lawyer to observe that appended thereto were these lines: 

“The finder of the missing cuff-link would deem it a great favor if the owner would kindly lose the other link.”

CHINAMAN—­“You tellee me where railroad depot?”

CITIZEN—­“What’s the matter, John?  Lost?”

CHINAMAN—­“No! me here.  Depot lost.”

LOVE

Love is an insane desire on the part of a chump to pay a woman’s board-bill for life.

MR. SLIMPURSE—­“But why do you insist that our daughter should marry a man whom she does not like?  You married for love, didn’t you?”

MRS. SLIMPURSE—­“Yes; but that is no reason why I should let our daughter make the same blunder.”

MAUDE—­“Jack is telling around that you are worth your weight in gold.”

ETHEL—­“The foolish boy.  Who is he telling it to?”