—­Friedrich von Logan.

See also Epitaphs; Husbands; Politicians; Real estate agents; Regrets.

LIBERTY

Liberty is being free from the things we don’t like in order to be slaves of the things we do like.

  A day, an hour, of virtuous liberty
  Is worth a whole eternity in bondage.

  —­Addison.

Where liberty dwells, there is my country.—­Benjamin Franklin.

LIBRARIANS

A country newspaper printed the following announcement:  “The Public Library will close for two weeks, beginning August 3, for the annual cleaning and vacation of the librarians.”

The modern librarian is a genius.  All the proof needed is the statement that the requests for books with queer titles are filled with ones really wanted.  The following are instances: 

    AS ASKED FOR CORRECT TITLE

Indecent Orders In Deacon’s Orders She Combeth Not Her Head She Cometh Not, She Said Trial of a Servant Trail of the Serpent Essays of a Liar Essays of Elia Soap and Tables AEsop’s Fables Pocketbook’s Hill Puck of Pook’s Hill Dentist’s Infirmary Dante’s Inferno Holy Smoke Divine Fire

One librarian has the following entries in a card catalog: 

  Lead Poisoning
  Do, Kindly Light.

A distinguished librarian is a good follower of Chesterton.  He says:  “To my way of thinking, a great librarian must have a clear head, a strong hand and, above all, a great heart.  Such shall be greatest among librarians; and when I look into the future, I am inclined to think that most of the men who will achieve this greatness will be women.”

Many catalogers append notes to the main entries of their catalogs.  Here are two: 

  An Ideal Husband: 
    Essentially a work of fiction,
     and presumably written by a
     woman (unmarried).

  Aspects of Home Rule: 
    Political, not domestic.

In a branch library a reader asked for The Girl He Married (by James Grant.) This happened to be out, and the assistant was requested to select a similar book.  Presumably he was a benedict, for he returned triumphantly with His Better Half (by George Griffith).

“Have you A Joy Forever?” inquired a lady borrower.

“No,” replied the assistant librarian after referring to the stock.  “Dear me, how tiresome,” said the lady; “have you Praed?” “Yes, madam, but it isn’t any good,” was the prompt reply.

LIFE

Life’s an aquatic meet—­some swim, some dive, some back water, some float and the rest—­sink.

  I count life just a stuff
  To try the soul’s strength on.