III.—­ETIQUETTE OF THE BALL-ROOM.[A]

On entering the ball-room, the visitor should at once seek the lady of the house, and pay his respects to her.  Having done this, he may exchange salutations with such friends and acquaintances as may be in the room.

If the ball be a public one, and a gentleman desires to dance with any lady to whom he is a stranger, he must apply to the master of the ceremonies for an introduction.

Even in private balls, no gentleman can invite a lady to dance without a previous introduction.  This introduction should be effected through the lady of the house, or a member of her family.

No lady should accept an invitation to dance from a gentleman to whom she has not been introduced.  In case any gentleman should commit the error of so inviting her, she should not excuse herself on the plea of a previous engagement, or of fatigue, as to do so would imply that she did not herself attach due importance to the necessary ceremony of introduction.  Her best reply would be to the effect that she would have much pleasure in accepting his invitation, if he would procure an introduction to her.  This observation may be taken as applying only to public balls.  At a private party the host and hostess are sufficient guarantees for the respectability of their guests; and, although a gentleman would show a singular want of knowledge of the laws of society in acting as we have supposed, the lady who should reply to him as if he were merely an impertinent stranger in a public assembly-room, would be implying an affront to her entertainers.  The mere fact of being assembled together under the roof of a mutual friend, is in itself a kind of general introduction of the guests to each other.

An introduction given for the mere purpose of enabling a lady and gentleman to go through a dance together, does not constitute an acquaintanceship.  The lady is at liberty to pass the gentleman in the park the next day without recognition.

No gentleman should venture to bow to a lady upon the strength of a ball-room introduction, unless she does him the honour to recognize him first.  If he commits this solecism he must not be surprised to find that she does not return his salutation.

No gentleman should accept an invitation to a ball if he does not dance.  When ladies are present who would be pleased to receive an invitation, those gentleman who hold themselves aloof are guilty, not only of a negative, but a positive act of neglect.

To attempt to dance without a knowledge of dancing is not only to make one’s self ridiculous, but one’s partner also.  No lady or gentleman has the right to place a partner in this absurd position.

Never forget a ball-room engagement.  To do so is to commit an unpardonable offence against good breeding.

It is not necessary that a lady or gentleman should be acquainted with the steps, in order to walk gracefully and easily through a quadrille.  An easy carriage and a knowledge of the figure is all that is requisite.  A round dance, however, should on no account be attempted without a thorough knowledge of the steps, and some previous practice.