Well, we went from there to Machinery Buildin’, that bein’ writ down next on my pad.  But as we walked along, I considerable riz up in my mind, owin’ to what I’d seen, who should we come acrost but the widder Whisher of Loontown, a woman we knew well.  She wuz settin’ on a bench cryin’ as if her heart would break, and I sez: 

“Why, sister Whisher, what is the matter?” (She wuz sister in the meetin’ house.)

She had a paper in her hand and held it out to us, “Jest see that!  I found it in the pocket of my innocent boy!” pintin’ to a coat layin’ by her.

“Why,” sez I, “that paper is took more than any other almost; I like it myself first-rate, its editorials are the brightest and smartest you’ll find anywhere.”

“Oh, but it is so sensational! so vulgar, so demoralizin’ to the tender and innocent heart of youth.  And to think that my spotless child that I have guarded so sedgously from every breath of evil should have it concealed in his pocket.  I have always burnt every copy I’ve found.”  And agin she sobbed, and agin I sez: 

“Sister Whisher, don’t take it so to heart; he’ll have to weather worst storms than this on the sea of life.  And you can’t expect to be with him always and stand to the hellum.”

“Oh, but Reginald Heber is so innocent, so pure-hearted; almost an angel,” sez she, “I have been so afraid that he wuz too perfect for this sinful world!” And her tears flowed afresh.

Well, I see I couldn’t plug up this flowin’ fountain of tears with sympathy or reason, so we mogged along.  Widder Whisher wuz always kinder soft and she’d made a perfect idol of Reginald, who wuzn’t any better than common children so fur as I could see.

And after goin’ a few steps, Josiah and I in advance, Blandina a little in our rears, who should we see comin’ directly towards us but Reginald Heber himself.  He evidently didn’t notice who we wuz, but wuz merely takin’ note of a new victim, for after takin’ fair aim at my stomach he bent his head down and went, “Choo, choo!—­choo, choo!” like a engine and run towards me at full speed, and bunted his round shingled head right into my stomach with almost the force of an arrer shot out of a catamount, yellin’ all the while like a demon.

“Git out of the way, you old four-eyed devil you!”

Makin’ light of my spectacles, I spoze, though truly I wuz too weak to reason.  After doublin’ me up in agony he sought safety in flight.  But my indignant pardner ketched him by his little short-tailed coat and dragged him back to his ma, hollerin’ at her: 

“I’ll give you a specimen of your innocent boy!  He’s jest the kind of an innocent angel I’d love to take a hemlock shingle to, and would, if it wuzn’t for makin’ talk.”  And he told the hull thing before I could interfere.

She wept afresh, but sez she, lookin’ at the whimperin’ and strugglin’ Reginald H., “How soon the demoralizin’ effects of that paper shows——­”