There was a time, methought it was but
lately departed,
When, if a thing was denied me, I felt
I was bound to attempt it;
Choice alone should take, and choice alone
should surrender.
There was a time, indeed, when I had not
retired thus early,
Languidly thus, from pursuit of a purpose
I once had adopted.
But it is over, all that! I have
slunk from the perilous field in
Whose wild struggle of forces the prizes
of life are contested.
It is over, all that! I am a coward,
and know it.
Courage in me could be only factitious,
unnatural, useless.
VIII.—CLAUDE TO EUSTACE.
Rome is fallen, I hear, the gallant Medici
taken,
Noble Manara slain, and Garibaldi has
lost il Moro;—
Rome is fallen; and fallen, or falling,
heroical Venice.
I, meanwhile, for the loss of a single
small chit of a girl, sit
Moping and mourning here,—for
her, and myself much smaller.
Whither depart the souls of
the brave that die in the battle,
Die in the lost, lost fight, for the cause
that perishes with them?
Are they upborne from the field on the
slumberous pinions of angels
Unto a far-off home, where the weary rest
from their labor,
And the deep wounds are healed, and the
bitter and burning moisture
Wiped from the generous eyes? or do they
linger, unhappy,
Pining, and haunting the grave of their
by-gone hope and endeavor?
All declamation, alas! though
I talk, I care not for Rome, nor
Italy; feebly and faintly, and but with
the lips, can lament the
Wreck of the Lombard youth and the victory
of the oppressor.
Whither depart the brave?—God
knows; I certainly do not.
IX.—MARY TREVELLYN TO MISS ROPER.
He has not come as yet; and now I must
not expect it.
You have written, you say, to friends
at Florence, to see him,
If he perhaps should return;—but
that is surely unlikely.
Has he not written to you?—he
did not know your direction.
Oh, how strange never once to have told
him where you were going!
Yet if he only wrote to Florence, that
would have reached you.
If what you say he said was true, why
has he not done so?
Is he gone back to Rome, do you think,
to his Vatican marbles?—
O my dear Miss Roper, forgive me! do not
be angry!—
You have written to Florence;—your
friends would certainly find him.
Might you not write to him?—but
yet it is so little likely!
I shall expect nothing more.—Ever
yours, your affectionate Mary.
X.—CLAUDE TO EUSTACE.
I cannot stay at Florence, not even to
wait for a letter.
Galleries only oppress me. Remembrance
of hope I had cherished
(Almost more than as hope, when I passed
through Florence the first
time)
Lies like a sword in my soul. I am
more a coward than ever,
Chicken-hearted, past thought. The