Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, August 2, 1890 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 42 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, August 2, 1890.

Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, August 2, 1890 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 42 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, August 2, 1890.

Phil (accosting the Scrubby Man).  Well, TABLETT, old fellow, how are things going with you? Sabrina flourishing?

Mr. Tablett (enthusiastically).  It’s a tremendous hit, my boy; orders coming in so fast they don’t know how to execute ’em—­there’s a fortune in it, as I always told you!

Phil.  Capital!—­but you’ve such luck.  By the way, my sister-in-law is most anxious to know you.

Mr. T. (flattered).  Very kind of her.  I shall be delighted.  I was just thinking I felt quite a stranger here.

Phil.  Come along then, and I’ll introduce you.  If she asks you to her parties by any chance, mind you go—­sure to meet a lot of interesting people.

Mr. T. (pulling up his collar).  Just what I enjoy—­meeting interesting people—­the only society worth cultivating, to my mind, Sir.  Give me intellect—­it’s of more value than wealth!

    [They go in search of Mrs. M.G.

First Lady on Chair.  Look at the dear Vicar, getting that poor Lady PAWPERSE an ice.  What a very spiritual expression he has, to be sure—­really quite apostolic!

Second Lady.  We are not in his parish, but I have always heard him spoken of as a most excellent man.

First Lady.  Excellent!  My dear, that man is a perfect Saint!  I don’t believe he knows what it is to have a single worldly thought!  And such trials as he has to bear, too!  With that dreadful wife of his!

Second Lady.  That’s the wife, isn’t it?—­the dowdy little woman, all alone, over there?  Dear me, what could he have married her for?

First Lady.  Oh, for her money, of course, my dear!

Mrs. Pattallons (to Mrs. ST. MARTIN SOMERVILLE).  Why, it really is you!  I absolutely didn’t know you at first.  I was just thinking, “Now who is that young and lovely person coming along the path?” You see—­I came out without my glasses to-day, which accounts for it!

Mr. Chuck (meeting a youthful Matron and Child).  Ah, Mrs. SHARPE, how de do! I’m all right.  Hullo, TOTO, how are you, eh, young lady?

Toto (primly).  I’m very well indeed, thank you. (With sudden interest).  How’s the idiot?  Have you seen him lately?

Mr. C. (mystified).  The idiot, eh?  Why, fact is, I don’t know any idiot!—­give you my word!

Toto (impatiently).  Yes, you do—­you know.  The one Mummy says you’re next door to—­you must see him sometimes!  You did say Mr. CHUCK was next door to an idiot, didn’t you, Mummy?

    [Tableau.

Mrs. Prattleton.  Let me see—­did we have a fine Summer in ’87?  Yes, of course—­I always remember the weather by the clothes we wore, and that June and July we wore scarcely anything—­some filmy stuff that belonged to one’s ancestress, don’t you know. Such fun!  By the way, what has become of Lucy?

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, August 2, 1890 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.