The pathetic earnestness with which this axiom was advanced, the sudden swift spasm of conviction that had flashed it across his mind, his certainty of the soundness of the assertion (paradoxical though it might appear), and his hasty, anxious glance below the Gangway opposite, apprehensive that that quarter would peradventure furnish a person capable of controverting it, all filled the House with keen delight.  Laughed for full sixty seconds by Westminster clock; OLD MORALITY standing at table looking round and wondering what on earth he’d said now.

Business done.—­Census Bills read Second Time.

Tuesday.—­Pretty quiet sitting, till DIMSDALE craftily crept upon the scene.  Don’t often hear from this distinguished member of the Order of Noble Barons; generally content to serve his country by voting for the Government.  To-night stirred in sluggish depths by omission of Government in preparing Census Bill to provide for Religious Census; so the Noble Baron moves Amendment designed to authorise Religious Census.  Opposition Benches nearly empty; those present listen listlessly; know it’s all right; Government are pledged against Religious Census; no harm in the Noble Baron moving his Amendment and making his speech; the Bill as introduced is safe.

[Illustration:  Another Noble Baron.]

Then up gets RITCHIE; drops remark, in off-hand manner, as if it did not signify, that Members on Ministerial side are free to vote as they please.  Sudden change of attitude in Opposition Benches.  Listlessness vanishes; a whisper of treachery goes round; CAMPBELL-BANNERMAN makes hot protest; HARCOURT sent for; comes in gleefully; matters been going so quietly, place unbearable for him; now a row imminent, HARCOURT joyously returns to Front Bench.  Seats fill up on both sides; OLD MORALITY hurries in; situation explained to him; dolefully shakes his head; HARCOURT thunders denunciation of a Ministry that plays fast and loose with House; then OLD MORALITY gets up, and publicly abjures DIMSDALE and his Amendment.  It was, he explained, only RITCHIE’S fun in saying Ministerialists were free to vote as they pleased on this matter.  The Government were against the Amendment, and of course good Ministerialists would vote with Ministers.  So they did, and DIMSDALE’S rising hopes crushed by majority of 288 against 69.

Business done.—­English Census Bill passed through Committee.

Wednesday.—­Came across NICHOLAS WOOD in remote corner of Corridor; had the depressed look familiar when he has been wrestling with great mental problems and finds himself worsted.

“What’s the matter now, NICHOLAS?  Thinking over what OLD MORALITY said yesterday about impossibility of doing more than one thing at a time?”