Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, July 26, 1890 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 46 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, July 26, 1890.

Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, July 26, 1890 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 46 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, July 26, 1890.
[On the 17th of July the Earl of ROSEBERY unveiled a Memorial erected in St. Paul’s Cathedral to the late Right Hon. WILLIAM BEDE DALLEY, of New South Wales, mainly through whose personal exertions, when Chief Secretary to the Ministry there, the Colonial Contingent was dispatched to the aid of England in the Soudan.  This, as Lord ROSEBERY said, is the first Memorial which has been erected to a Colonist in our Metropolitan Cathedral.]

  The mighty Empire reared upon the main,
  He “cherished, served, and laboured to maintain.” 
  And who will doubt the claim by this made good
  To neighbouring NELSON, and our COLLINGWOOD? 
  His country holds her loyal son’s remains;
  But here, whilst WREN’S huge dome rolls back the strains
  Of the great organ’s golden mouths, or while
  Paean or requiem sounds along the aisle
  Sacred to mighty memories, DALLEY’S name
  Inscribed amongst our home-born heirs of fame
  Shall stand, and show to all our Island brood
  Australia’s love, and England’s gratitude.

* * * * *

VERY MUCH AT SEA.

As there appears to be some confusion with regard to the exact nature of the programme scheme for the forthcoming Naval Autumn Manoeuvres, the following sketch, gleaned from recent inquiry on the subject made at Whitehall, may, if he can manage to follow it, possibly serve to enlighten the uninitiated outsider.

[Illustration]

An enemy’s fleet, having, it is supposed, escaped the vigilance of the Channel Squadron, consisting of H.M.  First-class Battle-ship Blunderer, accompanied by the third-class cruiser Jack-ass, and the torpedo-boats Corkscrew and Tooth-brush, which, also it is supposed, represent a fleet of thirty-six iron-clads, twenty-six armoured cruisers, attended by fifty torpedo vessels, have sailed victoriously up the Thames, and, having seized the Serpentine, command the, equally supposed, Milk Supply of Bayswater, Paddington, and the whole of the North of London.  This news having been conveyed to another fancied fleet that is covering a convoy of ships, imagined to be attempting to land corn, that they have brought from ports across the Atlantic, simultaneously at Pegwell Bay, Margate, and the Isle of Dogs, it is again supposed that, acting under sealed orders, they elude the enemy, and dividing their forces, make for Gravesend, Liverpool, Dundee, “The Welsh Harp” at Hendon, and Yarmouth.  The problem, therefore, presented to Admiral FLYOFF, who is in command of the defending squadrons, will be, after utilising the supposed coast defences, and mining the Serpentine, to force the enemy to accept the issue of an open action on the Regent’s Canal, and the Ornamental Water at the Crystal Palace.  Failing this, it will be left to the Umpires, who, being supposed to be in several places at the same time, will be provided with a tricycle, fog-horn, and telescope, to enable them to adjudge the exact amount of success or failure following respectively on each effort, with as near a resemblance as is possible to the probable issues in real warfare.  Any matters remaining in dispute and undecided, will be ultimately settled by the First Lord, who will toss up with a two-headed halfpenny, specially provided for, in the Estimates, for the purpose.

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Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 99, July 26, 1890 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.