I staid till she came in.  She was glad to see me; but, being very weak, said, she must sit down before she could go up stairs:  and so went into the back-shop; leaning upon Mrs. Lovick:  and when she had sat down, ’I am glad to see you, Mr. Belford, said she; I must say so—­let mis-reporters say what they will.’

I wondered at this expression;* but would not interrupt her.

* Explained in Letter XXVIII. of this volume.

O Sir, said she, I have been grievously harassed.  Your friend, who would not let me live with reputation, will not permit me to die in peace.  You see how I am.  Is there not a great alteration in me within this week! but ’tis all for the better.  Yet were I to wish for life, I must say that your friend, your barbarous friend, has hurt me greatly.

She was so weak, so short breathed, and her words and actions so very moving, that I was forced to walk from her; the two women and her nurse turning away their faces also, weeping.

I have had, Madam, said I, since I saw you, a most shocking scene before my eyes for days together.  My poor friend Belton is no more.  He quitted the world yesterday morning in such dreadful agonies, that the impression they have left upon me have so weakened my mind—­

I was loth to have her think that my grief was owing to the weak state I saw her in, for fear of dispiriting her.

That is only, Mr. Belford, interrupted she, in order to strengthen it, if a proper use be made of the impression.  But I should be glad, since you are so humanely affected with the solemn circumstance, that you could have written an account of it to your gay friend, in the style and manner you are master of.  Who knows, as it would have come from an associate, and of an associate, it might have affected him?

That I had done, I told her, in such a manner as had, I believed, some effect upon you.

His behaviour in this honest family so lately, said she, and his cruel pursuit of me, give me but little hope that any thing serious or solemn will affect him.

We had some talk about Belton’s dying behaviour, and I gave her several particulars of the poor man’s impatience and despair; to which she was very attentive; and made fine observations upon the subject of procrastination.

A letter and packet were brought her by a man on horseback from Miss Howe, while we were talking.  She retired up stairs to read it; and while I was in discourse with Mrs. Smith and Mrs. Lovick, the doctor and apothecary both came in together.  They confirmed to me my fears, as to the dangerous way she is in.  They had both been apprized of the new instances of implacableness in her friends, and of your persecutions:  and the doctor said he would not for the world be either the unforgiving father of that lady, or the man who had brought her to this distress.  Her heart’s broken:  she’ll die, said he:  there is no saving her.  But how, were I either the one or the other of the people I have named, I should support myself afterwards, I cannot tell.