was sure to meet Brunetta; Brunetta was now prepared for the Insult, and came to a public Ball in a plain black Silk Mantua, attended by a beautiful Negro Girl in a Petticoat of the same Brocade with which Phillis was attired.  This drew the Attention of the whole Company, upon which the unhappy Phillis swooned away, and was immediately convey’d to her House.  As soon as she came to herself she fled from her Husband’s House, went on board a Ship in the Road, and is now landed in inconsolable Despair at Plymouth.

POSTSCRIPT.

After the above melancholy Narration, it may perhaps be a Relief to the
Reader to peruse the following Expostulation.

  To Mr. SPECTATOR.

  The just Remonstrance of affronted THAT.

‘Tho’ I deny not the Petition of Mr. Who and Which, yet You should not suffer them to be rude and call honest People Names:  For that bears very hard on some of those Rules of Decency, which You are justly famous for establishing.  They may find fault, and correct Speeches in the Senate and at the Bar:  But let them try to get themselves so often and with so much Eloquence repeated in a Sentence, as a great Orator doth frequently introduce me.

My Lords! (says he) with humble Submission, That that I say is this; that, That that that Gentleman has advanced, is not That, that he should have proved to your Lordships.  Let those two questionary Petitioners try to do thus with their Who’s and their Whiches.

  ’What great advantage was I of to Mr. Dryden in his Indian
  Emperor,

    You force me still to answer You in That,

to furnish out a Rhyme to Morat?  And what a poor Figure would Mr. Bayes have made without his Egad and all That?  How can a judicious Man distinguish one thing from another, without saying This here, or That there?  And how can a sober Man without using the Expletives of Oaths (in which indeed the Rakes and Bullies have a great advantage over others) make a Discourse of any tolerable Length, without That is; and if he be a very grave Man indeed, without That is to say?  And how instructive as well as entertaining are those usual Expressions in the Mouths of great Men, Such Things as That and The like of That.

I am not against reforming the Corruptions of Speech You mention, and own there are proper Seasons for the Introduction of other Words besides That; but I scorn as much to supply the Place of a Who or a Which at every Turn, as they are unequal always to fill mine; And I expect good Language and civil Treatment, and hope to receive it for the future:  That, that I shall only add is, that I am,

  Yours,