It is a great Convenience to those who want Wit to furnish out a Conversation, that there is something or other in all Companies where it is wanted substituted in its stead, which according to their Taste, does the Business as well.  Of this nature is the agreeable Pastime in Country-Halls of Cross-purposes, Questions and Commands, and the like.  A little superior to these are those who can play at Crambo, or cap Verses.  Then above them are such as can make Verses, that is, Rhime; and among those who have the Latin Tongue, such as use to make what they call golden Verses.  Commend me also to those who have not Brains enough for any of these Exercises, and yet do not give up their Pretensions to Mirth.  These can slap you on the Back unawares, laugh loud, ask you how you do with a Twang on your Shoulders, say you are dull to-day, and laugh a Voluntary to put you in Humour; the laborious Way among the minor Poets, of making things come into such and such a Shape, as that of an Egg, an Hand, an Ax, or any thing that no body had ever thought on before for that purpose, or which would have cost a great deal of Pains to accomplish it if they did.  But all these Methods, tho’ they are mechanical, and may be arrived at with the smallest Capacity, do not serve an honest Gentleman who wants Wit for his Ordinary Occasions; therefore it is absolutely necessary that the Poor in Imagination should have something which may be serviceable to them at all Hours upon all common Occurrences.  That which we call Punning is therefore greatly affected by Men of small Intellects.  These Men need not be concerned with you for the whole Sentence; but if they can say a quaint thing, or bring in a Word which sounds like any one Word you have spoken to them they can turn the Discourse, or distract you so that you cannot go on, and by consequence if they cannot be as witty as you are, they can hinder your being any wittier than they are.  Thus if you talk of a Candle, he can deal with you; and if you ask him to help you to some Bread, a Punster should think himself very ill-bred if he did not; and if he is not as well-bred as your self, he hopes for Grains of Allowance.  If you do not understand that last Fancy, you must recollect that Bread is made of Grain; and so they go on for ever, without Possibility of being exhausted.

There are another Kind of People of small Faculties, who supply want of Wit with want of Breeding; and because Women are both by Nature and Education more offended at any thing which is immodest than we Men are, these are ever harping upon things they ought not to allude to, and deal mightily in double Meanings.  Every one’s own Observation will suggest Instances enough of this kind, without my mentioning any; for your double Meaners are dispersed up and down thro’ all Parts of Town or City where there are any to offend, in order to set off themselves.  These Men are mighty loud Laughers, and held very pretty Gentlemen with the sillier and unbred Part of Womankind.  But above all already mentioned, or any who ever were, or ever can be in the World, the happiest and surest to be pleasant, are a Sort of People whom we have not indeed lately heard much of, and those are your Biters.