The woman who knows how to show interest is tenfold more attractive than the woman who is for ever anxious to instruct.  Learn how to call out the best in other people, and lead them to talk of whatever most interests them.  In this way you will gain a wide knowledge of human nature, which is the best education possible.  Try and keep a little originality of thought, which is the most difficult of all undertakings while in college; and, if possible, be as lovable a woman when you go forth into the world “finished” as when you entered the doors of your Alma Mater:  for to be unlovable is a far greater disaster than to be uneducated.

To Edna Gordon

During Her Honeymoon

I am very much flattered that you should write your first letter as Mrs. Gordon to me.  Its receipt was a surprise, as I have known you so slightly—­only when we were both guests under a friend’s roof for one week.

I had no idea that you were noticing me particularly at that time, there was such a merry crowd of younger people about you.  How careful we matrons should be, when in the presence of debutantes, for it seems they are taking notes for future reference!

I am glad that my behaviour and conversation were such that you feel you can ask me for instructions at this important period of your life.  Here is the text you have given me: 

“I want you to tell me, dear Mrs. West, how to be as happy, and loved, and loving, after fifteen years of married life, as you are.  I so dread the waning of my honeymoon.”

And now you want me to preach you a little sermon on this text.  Well, my dear girl, I am at a disadvantage in not knowing you better, and not knowing your husband at all.

Husbands are like invalids, each needs a special prescription, according to his ailment.

But as all invalids can be benefited by certain sensible suggestions, like taking simple food, and breathing and exercising properly, and sleeping with open windows or out-of-doors, so all husbands can be aided toward perpetual affection by the observance of some general laws, on the part of the wife.

I am, of course, to take it for granted that you have married a man with principles and ideals, a man who loves you and desires to make a good husband.  I know you were not so unfortunate as to possess a large amount of property for any man to seek, and so I can rely upon the natural supposition that you were married for love.

It might be worth your while, right now, while your husband’s memory is fresh upon the subject, to ask him what particular characteristics first won his attention, and what caused him to select you for a life companion.

Up to the present moment, perhaps, he has never told you any more substantial reason for loving you than the usual lovers’ explanation—­“Just because.”  But if you ask him to think it over, I am sure he can give you a more explicit answer.