At that season the sun set by half-past five and supper was usually served about that time.  So dark was my room then that objects in it could scarcely be discerned.  About a quarter of an hour before the attendant was due to appear with my evening meal I made my preparations.  That the stage setting might be in keeping with the plot, I tore up such papers as I had with me, and also destroyed other articles in the room—­as one might in a frenzy; and to complete the illusion of desperation, deliberately broke my watch.  I then took off my suspenders, and tying one end to the head of the bedstead, made a noose of the other.  This I adjusted comfortably about my throat.  At the crucial moment I placed my pillow on the floor beside the head of the bed and sat on it—­for this was to be an easy death.  I then bore just enough weight on the improvised noose to give all a plausible look.  And a last lifelike (or rather deathlike) touch I added by gurgling as in infancy’s happy days.

No schoolboy ever enjoyed a prank more than I enjoyed this one.  Soon I heard the step of the attendant, bringing my supper.  When he opened the door, he had no idea that anything unusual was happening within.  Coming as he did from a well-lighted room into one that was dark, it took him several seconds to grasp the situation—­and then he failed really to take it in, for he at once supposed me to be in a semi-unconscious condition from strangulation.  In a state of great excitement this brute of the morning called to his brute partner and I was soon released from what was nothing more than an amusing position, though they believed it one of torture or death.  The vile curses with which they had addressed me in the morning were now silenced.  They spoke kindly and expressed regret that I should have seen fit to resort to such an act.  Their sympathy was as genuine as such men can feel, but a poor kind at best, for it was undoubtedly excited by the thought of what might be the consequences to them of their own neglect.  While this unwonted stress of emotion threatened their peace of mind, I continued to play my part, pretending to be all but unconscious.

Shortly after my rescue from a very living death, the attendants picked me up and carried my limp body and laughing soul to an adjoining room, where I was tenderly placed upon a bed.  I seemed gradually to revive.

“What did you do it for?” asked one.

“What’s the use of living in a place like this, to be abused as I’ve been to-day?” I asked.  “You and the doctor ignore me and all my requests.  Even a cup of water between meals is denied me, and other requests which you have no right to refuse.  Had I killed myself, both of you would have been discharged.  And if my relatives and friends had ever found out how you had abused and neglected me, it is likely you would have been arrested and prosecuted.”

Word had already been sent to the physician.  He hurried to the ward, his almost breathless condition showing how my farce had been mistaken for a real tragedy.  The moment he entered I abandoned the part I had been playing.