too suggestive of South Kensington Museum and aesthetic Encyclopaedias.  A truer art would have avoided both the glittering conceits, which bedeck the body of the story, and the unsavoury suggestiveness which lurks in its spirit.  Poisonous!  Yes.  But the loathly “leperous distilment” taints and spoils, without in any way subserving “perfection,” artistic or otherwise.  If Mrs. Grundy doesn’t read it, the younger Grundies do; that is, the Grundies who belong to Clubs, and who care to shine in certain sets wherein this story will be much discussed.  “I have read it, and, except for the ingenious idea, I wish to forget it,” says the Baron.

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The Baron has seen the new, lively, and eccentric newspaper, entitled The Whirlwind.  It has reached the third number.  “I am informed,” says the Baron, “that, on payment of five guineas down, I can become a life-subscriber to the Whirlwind.  But what does life-subscriber mean?  Do I subscribe for the term of my life, or for the term of the Whirlwind’s life?  Suppose the Whirlwind has to be wound up, or whirl-winded up, and suppose I am still going on, can I intervene to stop the proceedings, and insist on my contract to be supplied with a Whirlwind per week for the remainder of my natural or unnatural life being carried out?  If the contract is for our lives, then, as a life-subscriber, I should insist on the Whirlwind remaining co-existent with me, so that, up to my latest breath, I might have a Whirlwind.  But if the life-subscription of five guineas is only for the term of the Whirlwind’s life, then, I fancy the proprietors, editor, and staff, that the Hon. STUART ERSKINE and Mr. HERBERT VIVIAN, who are, I believe, the Proprietors, Editor, and Staff of the Whirlwind, will have by far the better of the bargain.  I resist the temptation, and keep my five pounds five shillings in my pocket, and am

“Yours truly, THE BARON DE BOOK-WORMS.”

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OUR NEW ADVERTISEMENT COLUMN.

[All applications in answer to be addressed to the office of this journal, accompanied by handsome P.O.O, and lots of shilling stamps, which will in every case be retained, without acknowledgment, as a guarantee of good faith.]

URGENT CASE.—­WANTED, by a little Boy, aged 10, of thoroughly disagreeable temper, selfish, greedy, ill-mannered, and thoroughly spoilt at home, a good sound Whipping, weekly, if possible.  Great care will be necessary on the part of applicant in fulfilling requirements, parents of youth in question, being firmly convinced that he is a noble little fellow, with a fine manly spirit, just what his dear Papa was at his age (as is very probably the case) and only requiring peculiarly gentle and considerate treatment.—­Apply (in first instance, by letter) to Godfather, care of Mr. Punch.