All the people were so courteous to us, and naturally Tom was more interested in this than any of the things we have yet seen.  One reporter who showed us round had a whimsical sense of humour (not “American humour,” that, as I told you before, is different) and we really enjoyed ourselves, and before we were out of the building they presented us with copies of the paper with accounts of our visit in the usual colossalised style.  Was not that quick work, Mamma?

The things they put in the papers here are really terrible, and must be awfully exciting for the little boys and girls who read them going to school; every paltry scandal in enormous headlines, and the most intimate details of people’s lives exposed and exaggerated, while the divorces and suicides fill every page.  But if there is anything good happening, like sailors behaving well at sea and saving lives, or any fine but unsensational thing, it only gets a small notice.  The poor reporters can’t help it; they are dismissed unless they worry people for interviews and write “catchy” articles about them, so, of course, they can’t stick to the truth; and as the people who read like to hear something spicy, they are obliged to give it all a lurid turn.  The female ones are sometimes spiteful; I expect because women often can’t help being so about everything.  These wonderfully sensational papers have only developed in the last ten years, we are told, so they have not had time to see the effect it is going to have upon the coming generation.

The better people don’t pay the least attention to anything that is printed, but of course ordinary people in any country would.

We lunched in the most fashionable restaurant down town, but I never can describe to you, Mamma, the noise and flurry and rush of it.  As if countless men screaming at the top of their voices and every plate being rattled by scurrying waiters, were not enough, there was the loudest band as well!  Unless you simply yelled you could not make your neighbour hear.  I suppose it is listening to the other din at the Stock Exchange all the morning;—­they would feel lonely if they had quiet to eat in.

Our party was augmented by a celebrated judge, and some other lawyers.  We had been told he was most learned and a wonderful wit, and someone we should see as a representative American; half the people said he was a “crook,” and the other half that he was the “only straight” judge; and when I asked what a “crook” was, our host told me the word explained itself, but that you would be called a crook by all the trusts if you gave judgment against them, just as, if you let them off, you would be the only honest judge.  So whatever you were called did not amount to anything!  The Judge was much younger than our judges, and had a moustache, and looked just like ordinary people, and not a bit dignified.