The Bicyclers and Three Other Farces eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 107 pages of information about The Bicyclers and Three Other Farces.

The Bicyclers and Three Other Farces eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 107 pages of information about The Bicyclers and Three Other Farces.

[Yardsley sinks into the arm-chair.  Barlow chuckles; Miss Andrews glances indignantly at him.

Dorothy.  Pardon me, Mr. Barlow.  If there is any humor in the situation, I fail to see it.

Barlow (seeing his error).  Nor, indeed, do I. I was not—­ah—­ laughing from mirth.  That chuckle was hysterics, Miss Dorothy, I assure you.  There are some laughs that can hardly be differentiated from sobs.

Jennie.  I was all took in a heap, mum, to think of a fine gentleman like Mr. Yardsley proposing to me, mum, and I says the same.  Says I, “Oh, Mr. Yardsley, this is so suddent like,” whereat he looks up with a countenance so full o’ pain that I hadn’t the heart to refuse him; so, fergettin’ Hicks for the moment, I says, kind of soft like, certingly, sir.  It ain’t for the likes o’ me to say no to the likes o’ him.

Yardsley.  Then you said you were engaged to Hicks.  You know you did, Jennie.

Barlow.  Ah!  Then you admit the proposal?

Yardsley.  Oh Lord!  Worse and worse!  I—­

Dorothy.  Jennie has not finished her story.

Jennie.  I did say as how I was engaged to Hicks, but I thought he would let me off; and Mr. Yardsley looked glad when I said that, and said he’d make it all right with Hicks.

Yardsley.  What?  I?  Jennie O’Brien, or whatever your horrible name is, do you mean to say that I said I’d make it all right with Hicks?

Jennie.  Not in them words, Mr. Yardsley; but you did say as how you’d see him yourself and give him a present.  You did indeed, Mr. Yardsley, as you was a-standin’ on that there Proossian rug.

Dorothy.  Did you, Mr. Yardsley?

[Yardsley buries his face in his hands and groans.

Barlow.  Not so ready with your explanations now, eh?

Dorothy.  Mr. Barlow, really I must ask you not to interfere.  Did you say that, Mr. Yardsley?

Yardsley.  I did, but—­

Dorothy (frigidly).  Go on, Jennie.

Jennie.  Just then the front-door bell rings and Mr. Barlow comes, and there wasn’t no more importunity for me to speak; but when I got down-stairs into the kitchen, mum, Mr. Hicks he comes in, an’ (sobs)—­ an’ I breaks with him.

Yardsley.  You’ve broken with Hicks for me?

Jennie.  Yes, I have—­but I wouldn’t never have done it if I’d known—­ boo-hoo—­as how you’d behave this way an’ deny ever havin’ said a word.  I—­I—­I 1-lo-love Mr. Hicks, an’—­I—­I hate you—­and I wish I’d let him come up and kill you, as he said he would.

Dorothy.  Jennie!  Jennie! be calm!  Where is Hicks now?

Yardsley.  That’s so.  Where is Hicks?  I want to see him.

Jennie.  Never fear for that.  You’ll see him.  He’s layin’ for you outside.  An’ that, Miss Dorothy, is why—­I was a-wavin’ at him an’ sayin’ “pst” to him.  I wanted to warn him, mum, of his danger, mum, because Hicks is very vi’lent, and he told me in so many words as how he was a-goin’ to do—­him—­up.

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The Bicyclers and Three Other Farces from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.